Choose Truth

 The past year has been tough—that's not hard to deny. From dirty politics, to racial tension, to Covid19 information (or misinformation), one thing that stands out is how difficult it is to find truth these days. We can't find truth on the news; we are fed lies every day on social media, and we sure can't get a solid answer from our political leaders. It's disheartening and causes insecurity and fear. Our media feeds on this fear, piling on information that is greatly skewed. And while feeling disillusioned by outside sources is frustrating, it's far less hurtful than when it comes from our inner circle.

I was listening to a radio broadcast the other day and the pastor relayed a personal story that stuck with me. Someone had said something about him that was completely untrue—someone he knew and thought was his friend. This piece of information got under his skin and caused him three sleepless nights and plenty of anger. When he met with one of his friends for coffee, he brought up what had happened. His friend stopped him halfway through the conversation and said, "Enough. I don't want to hear about that anymore!" Taken aback, his friend went on to explain that what was said was untrue, in the past, and if dwelt on, would shift his focus from serving God to being sidetracked by this issue.

How many can relate to this story? I can. What people say about me matters—even though I often tend to brush it off outwardly (but inside it's very damaging). But when the information is inaccurate, it's even more hurtful. One point we need to consider is this—if you're doing something for the Lord, expect adversity. Nothing will trip us up more than an attack against our character—especially from a close source. And so when this happens, we must ask some questions of ourselves.

Is what has been said about me true in any way? Really allow yourself time to reflect on this and search for proof behind statements or assumptions. We often are not aware of how our words or actions may be taken by others. If there is truth to what has been said, address the issue and make the necessary changes. Mending relationships is important, and when we are at fault for the breech, we should be taking the first step to restoring the relationship.

What if the information is not true—what do I do about it? This can be difficult when it's coming from someone you know, trust, or love. It hurts. Addressing the issue and offering "your side" is helpful, but won't always correct the situation. If someone truly knows your character, they should be willing to hear your side and consider the possibility that what they have heard does not align with what they have observed in your words and actions. If they refuse to believe the truth over the misinformation they have heard, you will have to leave it at an apology and allow God to work in their hearts on the matter. Staying stuck in this place will rob you of your spiritual purpose and the joy we should experience as God's children.

What if the information is actually true–even if it was taken the wrong way? A heartfelt apology is in order—not only to the one you have offended, but to God as well. When we say or do hurtful things, we hurt more than just the person we offended—we hurt the heart of our Heavenly Father. This step goes against our pride and our fleshly desire to be "right". It's humbling to accept responsibility for our actions and to offer an apology, but it's absolutely required. The apology may or may not be accepted—and if it is not, that's on them. As believers, we should show care and grace when we offend or have been offended. 

Words can be very damaging. Gossip, lies against someone's character, and spreading misinformation hurt people. Consider this when you have something to say, or something to share with others. Is it true? Is it accurate? Is it profitable? Is it damaging? Will it build up, or tear down? Before we open our mouths, may we take into consideration these important questions, and be willing to shut our mouths when what we have to say is unkind, malicious or untrue. May we be known as encouragers and people who speak the truth in love. 

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits (Proverbs 18:21, ESV).

There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing (Proverbs 12:18, ESV).

I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak (Matthew 12:36, ESV),

"You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor (Exodus 20:16, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, help us to weigh our words—the words we say and the words we hear. Help us to be truthful and to dwell on truth, knowing that dwelling on lies causes us to become angry and bitter. Purify our hearts so that our words will follow. In Your name we pray, Amen.