Hope is Better than We Realize

 I was in the grocery store the other day, and I heard a little boy talking about getting a dog. "I really hope we get a new puppy, mom." I could see longing in his eyes and hear it in his voice. Getting a puppy is a pretty big deal for a kid, and I remember hoping for the same when I was a child. Lucky for me, I've come to be the owner of quite a few dogs—each very special to me.

Maybe like me, you have a laundry list of things you are hoping for. I hope I get to go somewhere warm, balmy and tropical this summer. I hope spring weather comes soon—I'm sick of rainy, cold days. I hope my children have the most amazing future and enjoy a close relationship with their Heavenly Father. I hope the money we invested in dog training produces the most well-behaved Jack Russell terrier around (quite the feat). The truth is, I hope for many things, yet my hoping does not guarantee they will come to pass. 

"Hope" is a word we use very differently in our culture than what it means when read it in Scripture. When we hope for something, we are essentially "wishing" for it. Our hope is something we long for, but it simply may not happen. If we applied this same meaning when we read this word in Scripture, it would imply that our hope in God isn't really secure—it's possible, but not guaranteed! When we understand God and His Word, we see how our use of this word today cannot be the same as when it was used in God's Word when relating to our hope being in God.

"Hope" is commonly used to mean a wish: its strength is the strength of the person's desire. But in the Bible "hope" is the confident expectation of what God has promised and its strength is in His faithfulness." (onlinelibrary.wiley.com)

When we speak of biblical hope, we speak of it with confidence. The weather, people, finances, and situations are all circumstantial things we may hope for, but they are not definite and we cannot know how those circumstances will play out. Our hope is a desire, but we may not get what we wish for.

In the Bible, hope and faith are interlinked. When we look at Hebrews 11:1, we see evidence of this: "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." Our hope is a sure thing, because we have faith in God. This type of hope is only available and known by believers. Our hope is characterized by confidence and not just wishing for something. 

Another characteristic that accompanies our hope is anticipation for something far  better. We are waiting and hoping on our Lord's return to take us home. What is waiting for us—our eternal inheritance in Christ, is far better than the best we can possibly experience here. Our hope lies in a promise given by Jesus when He left this world: "Behold, I am coming soon, bringing my recompense with me, to repay each one for what he has done (Revelation 22:12, ESV)."

Friends, with all of the uncertainties and painful circumstances we experience, isn't it wonderful to have confidence in our Father? To know He is with us, for us, and coming soon to take us home? This isn't just something we wish for—it's an absolute. Somedays when life hurts—when people disappoint me and my heart is broken, I find such comfort in knowing my trials are temporary. Whatever situation you may be battling in this moment, it has an expiration date. Our hope is something we can be sure of—deliverance is coming!

Maybe when you use this word the next time, you'll remember what it means when it's rooted in God's promises. It can be confusing when we think of hope as only a possibility when we understand the faithfulness of God. And as we read it in Scripture regarding our future in Christ, understand it is a promise and God always keep His promises. Our hope in Christ isn't on shaky ground—it isn't tied to wishing or longing. May we know with absolute confidence that God is our hope, and one day soon, He will bring us into the good of that hope—our eternal inheritance. I long for it—yes. I wish for it—certainly. But oh how awesome it is to be assured of it. 

For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience (Romans 8:24-25, ESV).

For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope (Romans 15:4, ESV).

"And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you (Psalm 39:7, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, we thank You for being the Source of our hope. Your faithfulness gives us confidence that our hope in You is secure. We don't have to wish or wonder, we can know. We look forward to our inheritance, Lord, and thank You for the hope You have given us. In Your name we pray, Amen.

Lies We've Been Sold

I stood in front of my mirror the other morning and actually felt a little disgusted with myself. I blame Covid quarantine, but the truth is—it's rooted far deeper than that excuse. A little extra weight, gray roots and cellulite were enough to bring me frustration and a feeling of discontentment. We can't seem to see beyond the exterior, no matter how hard we wish we all could. "She's nice though", they say, which means she's lacking in less important ways. Does all of this resonate with you, or have you not "heard" what's expected of us—or so we've been disillusioned to believe?

The truth is, we've bought into the lies of Hollywood. It doesn't matter if I'm 50 because 50 is now the new 30. Really? Tell that to my body. If you aren't slim, dressed well, tan and have beautiful teeth and hair, you don't measure up. In fact, we have the audacity to say things like: "you could hardly blame him" when we lose the attention of our spouse. Do you know how ridiculous that statement is?  

This lie transfers to our relationships. There are those who choose a circle of friends that look a certain way or act a certain way—attractive and affluent. These relationships are often built on things that have no real lasting value and crumble when faced with adversity. The same is true of marriages. If they were based solely on looks and sexual attraction, they were built on a faulty foundation and won't be able to stand the test of hardship and the realities of life.

Who has ever thought their life would be better if they only looked better? There is a whole retail world full of proof that this is a common vein of thought. The fitness industry is also proof that we are a people who suffer greatly from insecurity. Yes—exercise is important, but oftentimes the sad reality is that we've bought into the perception that being fit is required for being loved and valued. So how do we combat the lies we've bought into and free ourselves from them? 

I'm going to share with you what God has to say about us, but understand that I'm in no way presenting to you that I'm free of insecurity myself. It's crazy to me how I can listen to the lies of Hollywood but refuse to believe the truth of my Creator. When I think of it that way, it honestly makes no sense. But on those days you may struggle yourself, with unwanted weight, thinning hair, wrinkles, or whatever it is you dislike about yourself (because we all have things we don't like), we can find comfort in God's Word. In It, we won't find condemnation for falling short of the world's standards; we will only find we are deeply loved and treasured by God.

First off—we are reminded from God's Word that outward beauty is not where it's at. Beauty fades and oftentimes produces vanity. What God sees as beauty is found inside of us. We may think to ourselves, "well, that won't get me married" but marrying someone based on our looks won't satisfy us or build a relationship that will last. What God sees as beautiful has to do with our hearts and our response to serving and loving Him. Here are a few scriptures that prove this truth:

"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised (Proverbs 31:30)."

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious (1 Peter 3:3-4)."

I'm not sure about you, but I know for me, one of the joys of Heaven will be the relief found in laying aside the pressures of this world's standards. None of it will matter anymore, and none of what I invested myself in for furthering my outward beauty will follow me there. What will matter will be my inner beauty—or absence of it. Some of the most insecure people are those who seem to have everything on the outside but are empty inside. Let's make building up treasure in Heaven a greater goal than the effort we put in looking attractive on the outside.

For women especially, body image is a real struggle. We measure ourselves against 3-5% of the population considered "beautiful". The reality is, most of us don't fall into that tiny slice of the pie, but in God's eyes, all of that doesn't matter. What does matter is my heart. I hope, like me, you can remember these things when you have a morning where you feel overly critical of your flaws. I hope it helps you see yourself through God's eyes and releases you from the lies we've bought into. I hope that today, you remember how loved and treasured you are, and how you are made in the very image of God. 

Dear Heavenly Father, help us to see beyond the exterior and see what really matters in ourselves and in others. The world lies to us. Satan lies to us. But in You, we are loved and treasured. Thank You, Father, for that wonderful truth. In Your name we pray, Amen!

Relationships and Marriage 101

 Maybe you're dating, and everything about your girl or guy seems perfect. You can't think of one thing that you seriously don't just love about them. You wake in the morning and smile when you think of them. You fall asleep at night longing for the day you never have to be apart again. It's a match made in heaven, and you can't imagine ever being unhappy together.

Maybe you're engaged, and you've been together a little longer. Life has exposed a few flaws in the one you thought was perfect for you. Overall, they are still pretty great, but you can now pinpoint a few things about your love that irritate and upset you. "Am I making the biggest mistake of my life", you wonder, or is this just normal stuff?

And maybe you're married, and if you are, you've likely figured out by now that your wonderful spouse isn't perfect—sigh. They don't seem to know how to put away their clothes, and they get toothpaste all over the bathroom mirror. And even worse—they have moments where their temper flares or they are too busy to give you the proper attention you desperately crave. What in the world did I do? What did I see in this person, and how was I so blind?

The more vulnerable we become with someone, the more we begin to know the "real them". And oftentimes, this births in us the ridiculous notion that we must be the person responsible to change the things we don't like in our partner. "If only they were more _____, or why does he always have to _____?" Pointing our fingers elsewhere takes pressure off ourselves. It's easy to desire or demand change in our partner thinking this will resolve the issues in our relationship, but what does Scripture have to say about it?

Here is a pretty forthright portion of Scripture regarding this type of behavior: "Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother,'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye (Matthew 7:3-5, ESV)." 

Essentially, this portion of Scripture reminds us to take care of our own junk before worrying about someone else's. It means that we attend to the shortcomings we have before even considering the flaws in our spouse. It requires me to take inventory of my own actions and behavior before looking outward. It may involve my own resolve to correct habits of messiness, moodiness, careless words when I'm hungry, or criticism. And only when I've succeeded in correcting them should I even begin to start pointing out the flaws of my husband. Long story short—I'll likely never get my act completely together to make it to that point. Why? Because I have too many issues of my own.

If you are looking for the perfect husband or wife, you're going to really be disappointed. You may find one that is well-suited for you and brings you happiness, but you'll never find one without their own laundry list of faults and failures. When we stop to think of how our marriages are a picture of how Jesus loves us, it gives us a better grasp of the reality of loving imperfect people. I am beyond thankful that Jesus love isn't conditional, because if it were, I would not qualify. Instead, He chooses to love us in spite of all our shortcomings and pours His grace over them instead. Because of this, how can I not do the same with my spouse?

If you're in a place of discontentment and feel the need to look around you for who can change to make your life better, stop! Replace this negative pattern with the resolve to correct your own issues. When we work on ourselves, the people we love respond to our progress, and oftentimes our behavior changes theirs for the better. We often throw around the phrase "loving like Jesus", and who better to begin with than our other half? This means you will love them in all of their messiness and shower them with grace and unconditional love. It means you won't point fingers and look for ways to control change or nag them—you'll start with yourself, and if you're anything like me, you have a lot of work to do. 

An intelligent heart acquires knowledge, and the ear of the wise seeks knowledge (Proverbs 18:15, ESV).

To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4:22-24, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, help us to be willing to take a good look at ourselves and see our own shortcomings and then make necessary changes. Help us not to be finger pointers, but to first acknowledge our own need for change. May we love the way You have taught us in Your perfect, grace-filled love for us. In Your name we pray, Amen!