A Different Christmas

 The thing about Christmas celebrations are that they are often deeply rooted in tradition. I love traditions—especially Christmas traditions. I am a sentimental girl at heart and nothing pulls on those heartstrings like the things that make our Christmas unique and special to me and my own family. Just hearing Ray Conniff's version of "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear" conjures up memories from the time I was a little girl. It's a tradition we still have as a signal that it's time for Christmas festivities to begin.

But sometimes, traditions change. It's hard to part with those we held dear for so long, but life changes, so naturally, traditions change too. And there is good in that mixed with a little sadness as well. And because life changes, we often find ourselves with empty chairs at the Christmas table. Maybe our loved one is spending Christmas somewhere else this year, or maybe they've passed away.

This has been another difficult year for so many. Personally, I have lost friends of mine this year to Covid19, and it's been hard to come to grips with. Families will be celebrating, but with huge, gaping holes in their hearts. Some may not even be able to conjure up a Christmas plan—their pain is too deep. My heart aches for them.

Our own Christmas table has dwindled through the years—some from change, and some from death. And yet as we may feel a sense of disappointment or sadness, we must remember that Christmas isn't about tradition or even who is seated at our table. And while it doesn't necessarily erase the pain or the adjustment we face with change, it does prompt us to reflect on what this season is all about.

When I think of Christmas, what are my first thoughts about? I confess it's so easy to get caught up in the traditions and the commercialization of the holiday. I also confess to love those aspects of Christmas, but they don't touch my heart the way the greater story does—the birth of our Savior that long ago night in a stable in Bethlehem. I've spent perhaps more time reflecting on that story this year than any year prior, and I think one of the reasons is the story remains the same. Nothing about it will ever change, and that's a beautiful thing.

Change is inevitable. People change and life changes. We move on from certain things and never look back. We may change locations or career paths or find ourselves facing family changes. Empty nests and new babies—marriage and sadly even divorce—falling in love and feeling brokenhearted and alone—these are also everyday realities for us. And while some may feel joyful this Christmas season, some are also depressed, discouraged, lonely and heartbroken.

If you're facing some changes you may not feel happy about this season, maybe the unchanging, faithful story of Jesus birth can fill you with joy. His birth is the very hope the world had waited for—the hope for a Savior to rescue and redeem a broken world. That child was the fulfillment of promises made from the beginning of time, and the promise I still hold to for my own redemption. 

Christmas is Jesus—it's not in all the things we try to make it about, even as they may enhance our celebrating. And so whatever your Christmas looks like—different or the same—the reason behind it will never change. She brought forth her newborn Son and called His name JESUS—because He would save His people from sin. That's an unchanging truth worth celebrating with great joy.

She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins (Matthew 1:21, ESV)."

The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever (Isaiah 40:8, ESV).

God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it (Numbers 23:19, ESV)?

You First

 Today was my errand running day in a nearby town. I wanted to go to Target, Best Buy, and Bath and Body for those $10.25 3-wick candles. If you're reading this on December 3rd, the sale is still on! Everywhere I went was busy and crowded. I found myself rushing from one place to the next and on my drive home, I felt uptight and a little irritated for no real reason at all. 

That's the worst mood to be in if you're going to have a tailgater bumping along behind you—am I right? It seemed everyone was uptight along with me, and as much as I love the Christmas season, it seems to make us a little short on patience (or is it just me?). I behaved myself and didn't give in to extreme aggravation because the words I heard from a sermon lately rolled right across my heart. Those words were "you first". 

Not easy. Not natural. Not what usually first comes to mind when I feel stressed or under pressure, but there they were, plain as day and meant specifically for me in that moment. Instead of head shaking and cutting looks and maybe even the teensiest bit of slowing down on purpose, I simply heard those words over and over and over again.

This got me thinking about how this phrase should be my posture every day, all the time. A busy line filled with cranky people? Allow the mom with the screaming toddler to go first. One sought after toy of this holiday season sits there staring at you and one other mom that looks menacing and slightly threatening? Politely say, "please—help yourself." The last piece of apple pie all warm and gooey and delicious—give it to the person behind you.

I've got to say, this will need to be a discipline we must continually learn because it asks us to deny ourselves. I don't know about you, but when it comes down to it, I can be pretty selfish—especially to a stranger I know nothing about. But can you imagine how much less stress, and more joy we would feel if we simply chose to serve others by saying, "you first"? 

This posture of serving is one Jesus taught us Himself in the life He displayed for us in Scripture. To the hungry people—He met their need, even though He was surely tired and hungry Himself. To the disciples He loved and spent His days with, He washed their dirty feet. To the towns He visited—although He would be going out of His way for just one person, He went anyway so they could be healed. He taught us the discipline of "you first" by His own example. 

As is my habit, I am often rushing from one thing to another, feeling short of breath from stress as I move through my busier days. These are the moments I'm most likely to display character that is selfish, rather than selfless. I pray that this season—as I enjoy so many things about it, I'll be able to remove hurry from my life and feel more at peace. I pray that I'll be less uptight and more gracious. And that any time I begin to feel irritated from the rush, I'll remember those words once again, preserving me from an attitude that would not please the Lord. "You first". . .that's my Christmas motto.

In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, "It is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35, ESV)."

Even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many (Matthew 20:28, ESV)."

And he sat down and called the twelve. And he said to them, "If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all (Mark 9:35, ESV)."

Our Daily Bread

 Bread is one of my most pleasurable life indulgences. It's not good for my waistline, but it tastes incredibly delicious. Even just the smell of it can make my mouth water. Give me some cold butter (no substitutes!) and I'm a happy woman! Any other bread lovers out there? I get this love of bread from my dad. We often teased him about how happy it made him when they brought a fresh bread basket to the table at a restaurant. But seriously—I was no less happy than he. 

Bread is mentioned often in the Bible. In fact, I was pretty surprised when I googled the number, and found it is mentioned around 492 times. That's a pretty remarkable number and causes us to take note, recognizing it has extreme significance in God's Word. Perhaps one of the most notable Bible references that comes to mind is how God sent manna to sustain the Children of Israel in the wilderness. Each day, He sent what was necessary to fill each of them with their necessary food as this delightful bread was provided early each morning. The taste of manna is described as wafers with honey. I'm sold!

But the next mention of bread that stands out to me is in the Lord's Prayer. He states, "Give us this day, our daily bread." Now I believe this prayer includes our physical need for nourishment, but also—so much more. I think of this statement being whispered from our own lips in situations that call for help. Help that doesn't include physical hunger but reveals a need—needs that express a void or a situation that distresses us—a place only the Lord can fill.

"I don't know how we will pay all the bills this month!"

(Give us this day, our daily bread)

"I have no idea what to do about the state of my marriage!"

(Give us this day, our daily bread)

"How can I go on without her?"

(Give us this day, our daily bread)

"I feel so stressed out with all these deadlines."

(Give us this day, our daily bread)

"I feel inadequate as a wife, a mother, or an employee."

(Give us this day, our daily bread)

Scripture refers to Jesus as the Bread of Life—our Sustenance and our Sustainer. He isn't just the Provider of our food, but the Provision for our every need. When we are stressed, worried, afraid, insecure, or sick—He is our Bread. He longs to fill our hearts and minds—not just our stomachs. 

Whatever has you emotionally bogged down, whisper words of invitation to our Bread of Life—words that ask Him to fill the needs you have today. He created you and all of creation. He conquered the cross. He rose from the grave. He saves us from hell. And as we read in the Bible a handful of times: "Is anything too hard for the Lord?" The answer is no. 

Life is difficult and full of situations that distress us, and sometimes—life just hurts. But we aren't without hope. We haven't been left here to flounder on our own. Jesus—our Bread of Life longs to sustain us. We can face the impossible with expectance. As much as our shoulders want to droop and our breath may become short and shallow, we have every reason to stand tall and run the race set before us. Whatever is troubling you, release it at the feet of Jesus. Recall His great power and His perfect ability to stand in the midst of your inadequacies—even if it's just a whispered prayer for Him to supply your daily bread.

Jesus said to them, "I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst (John 6:35, ESV)."

I Wasn't Ready Yet

 I received a message through my Instagram account the other day, and something in it really struck a chord with me: "I wasn't ready, yet", she said. I've said it, and maybe you have too. How many things do we not feel ready for? I know for me, the list would be pretty extensive. In this particular case, she wasn't ready for words of hope—because sometimes, we feel the need to flounder in our grief and pain as we grapple with reality. We wrestle with our shocking feelings surrounding painful circumstances, and need to spend some time there.

I can relate. I have my own lapse between discovery and the quest for healing. Or maybe that lapse is really just the very beginning of the process that leads us to healing. When we receive shocking news—whether betrayal in our marriage, the death of a loved one, a serious diagnosis, or some other painful discovery, our initial response is not usually acceptance—that comes later in the grieving/healing process.

It helps to know this is a natural response for most humans. It doesn't make me a bad person or a bad Christian if I spend a little time between discovery and acceptance. It doesn't mean I don't believe God is good—but it does mean my faith in His goodness is being called to the test, even as He patiently waits for me to learn to trust Him with this hard news.

The truth is, when I hear something especially difficult, I like to nurse that pain for a while. Whether it's minutes or days, those feelings match the bad news. I need time to properly grieve those hurts and disappointments before I feel ready to move on and move forward—maybe you need this space too. But even in those days of nursing my wounds and floundering in my feelings, I'm still so deeply touched with His tender presence—giving comfort until I'm ready. 

I lost a dear friend this week, and I wasn't ready to hear she had passed away. I had hoped for healing—healing that would place her back in this world—healthy and whole and pouring herself back into her family and friends once again. We prayed and we believed, yet God took her home. I feel pain over our temporary parting—space is needed until acceptance comes. God knows. He understands our need for this time, yet it won't stop Him from planting precious truths into our hurting hearts. This is the soil needed for future acceptance—knowing He deeply cares for our hurts and pains.

Maybe you're somewhere between hard news and acceptance. Maybe you're wrestling with the darkness of those painful feelings—the deepness of grief. Maybe you don't even want to think of God, and are pressing against His longing to comfort you. If He is in control, then He could have allowed a different outcome—different news than what you're facing. Does He care for your hurt and pain, and does He understand the feelings we face as we grieve? He does, friends, He does.

We need days where we wallow in the bad news and we ask God, "why?" And while it's a natural part of the process of grieving, let us not stay stuck there. The truth is, bad news will come to us all at some point in our lives—and it seems more and more often as we age. Sin has broken this world, and it's broken us, too. That's why we desperately need Jesus—the God of all comfort. 

Maybe today you don't feel ready to accept whatever it is you're facing. Maybe you just want to nurse your pain another day. Maybe you aren't ready yet—ready to move forward. To accept. To heal. To trust God with your broken heart. Maybe today, hope doesn't feel possible. But tomorrow is a new day. Pray about your heart. Know that Jesus cares so very deeply for you. His ways are best, even when they hurt. 

We don't always need to know why, but eventually we must accept the present reality. We must remember God's faithful love, and that He works all things for good–even when it doesn't feel good. One day, you'll be ready, and one day you'll look back and see how far He's brought you. Don't spend too much time wallowing and nursing your pain—you have big things He has planned for you—things you don't want to miss. You aren't alone in this—He is always with us. So today in that space between hard news and acceptance, may you feel His love beckoning you to trust Him. May you learn to lean into His tender, strong arms and carry you through. He is our Good, Good Father—every single moment of every single day.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4, ESV). 

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3, ESV). 

The Goodness of God- Psalm 103

 Before the death of Jesus at Calvary, I have often had different thoughts about who the Lord was to the Old Testament saints. Was He more of a Judge, throwing down verdict in form of fire and pestilence for disobedience, or was He the God of provision—shown to Abraham as his son lay on the altar awaiting death? Did He desire to have a close relationship with all of who would long for it, or did He choose certain people to bestow favor on—like Moses, Isaac, Abraham or a Joshua? Before the cross, I tend to think of Him as being less merciful and gentle, and yet when I stopped to read Psalm 103, I got a glimpse of David's good LORD. Let me share some of it with you:

Let all that I am praise the LORD; may I never forget the good things he does for me. 

He forgives my sins

and heals my diseases.

He redeems me from death

and crowns me with love and tender mercies.

He fills my life with good things,

My youth is renewed like the eagle's!

The LORD gives righteousness and justice to all who are treated unfairly.

The LORD is compassionate and merciful,

slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.

He will not constantly accuse us,

nor remain angry forever.

He does not punish us for all our sins;

he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve.

For his unfailing love to those who fear him

is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.

He has removed our sins as far from us

as the east is from the west.

The LORD is like a father to his children,

tender and compassionate to those who fear him.

For he knows how weak we are;

he remembers we are only dust (Psalm 103:2-6, 8-14, NLT).

On this page, written many, many years ago, I see the heart of my own Savior. One who is Forgiver, Healer, Redeemer—compassionate and full of mercy and goodness. He doesn't deal harshly with us as we rightly deserve. He is a loving and tender Father. And He knows everything about us—even our weaknesses. He certainly knew David's, and yet this was the LORD David knew and loved—and the LORD that loved David, despite his many failures.

For any who may be longing for the LORD, this little Psalm is packed full of Him. If you read it with understanding, you will clearly see His good character and it will hopefully birth in you, a longing to know and serve Him better. Charles H. Spurgeon's Treasury of David states this about Psalm 103: "There is too much in the Psalm, for a thousand pens to write, it is one of those all-comprehending Scriptures which is a Bible in itself, and it might alone suffice for the hymn-book of the church." 

I am no David—or even a Charles Spurgeon. But I've come to know each characteristic listed in this song of my LORD, drawing me to a true longing for Him. The world is filled with discouragement and painful situations. Life presses upon all of us at times and fills us with a deep ache—an ache only the good LORD of Psalm 103 can fill. Do you want Him? Do you long for Him? He is our good, good Father who despite the circumstances of living in a broken and sinful world, fills our lives with good things. May we take some time today to reflect on His character and thank Him for His tender, compassionate love toward us. 

An Accurate View of God

 Many people grow up with a warped view of God. He may be thought of as a huge etherial Creature that sits on a giant throne in some distant land in the sky. He's harsh, and ready to strike when you make a wrong move. He is impersonal and disinterested—unless you mess up. He makes rules that feel like punishment, and likes to hold back good things from us. He labels things as sinful that our nature naturally wants (sex outside of marriage, recreational drugs, excess alcohol, the love of money, etc)—depriving us. He's angry and menacing and watching with critical eyes. This view of God is completely wrong, and yet many people hold thoughts along these lines.

But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness (Psalm 86:15, ESV).

Other people fall on the other end of the spectrum and see God as a hip Friend in the sky. He loves us all (true) so much, that He will overlook our sin. He changes His mind about what His Word clearly says based on popular opinion of the present day. He's an "anything goes" kind of God who turns His face from sinful choices because He is our Friend and doesn't want to upset us or make waves. He's a God who takes every "good" person home to heaven when they die, no matter if they were a true believer or not. This is another completely false view of God that many hold as truth.

Worship the LORD in the splendor of holiness; tremble before him, all the earth (Psalm 96:9, ESV)!

The truth is, neither of these views is accurate. God is gracious and full of mercy, but He is also holy. God's holiness demands respect and reverence. God is also loving and kind, yet demands obedience, repentance from sin, and our whole hearts—a living sacrifice. He is fair and just and always in control. He isn't subject to change, which we should find refreshing and encouraging—we never have to wonder what He expects because He never changes. 

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever (Hebrews 13:8, ESV).

God is our Creator, and as such, He understands us perfectly. He knows what is bad for us and can cause us heartache and pain—that's why He asks us to keep our bodies pure. He doesn't hold things back from us to make us miserable; He asks us not to do certain things because they will damage us. God longs to have a relationship with each one of us, and yet He leaves our pursuit of Him as a choice we must make. He will pursue us, but He will never force us to choose Him. 

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me (Revelation 3:20, ESV).

Having an accurate view of God is important if we are to know Him and serve Him. The only way we can know Him is to come to Him through the Father. How is this possible? By putting our faith and trust in the gift of the cross of Calvary. There, Jesus died to put away sin forever, calling us to believe that He is the Son of God who died to rescue us from sin and hell, and rose on the third day, victorious over death. This truth is what we call 'salvation'—an act of acceptance in what Jesus accomplished for us on that cross. 

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16, ESV).

Once we come to intimately know Jesus as our Savior, our view of Him should change. The more we study the Bible, the more we learn about Him. The more we pray and spend time with Him, the more clearly we see and understand Him. We won't have a warped view—we will begin seeing the truth of who God is through the lens of time spent learning and communicating with Him. 

Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path (Psalm 119:105, ESV).

God wants us to know Him—and He knows us better than anyone else ever could (and still loves us)! How we live and love as Christians has a loud voice. Our behavior reflects on our Savior. May we each live in such a way that the world has a clearer picture of who our God is, and that through us, they may have a desire to know Him better.

But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect (1 Peter 3:15, ESV),

When The World Shakes Around You

A number of years ago, I recall sitting on my couch in the living room when my house began to rattle and shake. Living in the Lake Norman area of North Carolina, earthquakes are not common, nor are they quakes that cause significant damage. They fall relatively low on the scale of intensity, but it's a weird and unsettling feeling nonetheless, and one I had never felt before.

Lately, our world is shaking. Earthquakes—yes, but in a very real sense, the world around us is unsettled—full of chaos and frightening events. My heart breaks for Haiti. My spirit feels shaken by the events in Afghanistan. Our country is at war over the handling of Covid19, dividing families and friends. The stock market has been impacted by all of these events causing fear and uncertainty in people's financial welfare. 

Personally, your world may be shaking, too. Maybe it's one of your children facing a terminal illness. Maybe it's your spouse, unfaithful and uncaring. Maybe it's your business—struggling to survive in an unstable economy. Or maybe it's even you—sick and tired of life and the struggles you're facing day after day. The world around you seems to not only be shaking, but tumbling down on top of you.

These feelings aren't new, in fact, they take me back to the early Church believers and the many trials they faced. Persecution was a daily worry. They were well-acquainted with suffering. We read often in Scripture where Paul and other New Testament writers wrote words to encourage them in the midst of these trials. We know from history that these believers faced be-heading, death in the arena by hungry lions, and many other forms of torture and imprisonment. And in the middle of these thoughts my heart is bolstered by these precious words from Scripture—the same words spoken to them many years ago:

"After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you (1 Peter 5:10)."

"So they went on their way from the presence of the Council, rejoicing that they had been considered worthy to suffer shame for His name (Acts 5:41)."

"If we endure, we will also reign with Him; if we deny Him, He will also deny us (2 Timothy 2:12)."

"For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us (Romans 8:18)."

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing (James 1:2-4)."

"For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison (2 Corinthians 4:17),"

Today, if your load is heavy, rest on these words from Scripture. God longs to comfort us in our deepest struggles and offers us His strength to endure to the end. Some days our souls feel so weary and our body is tight with worry, stress or fear. Jesus has great compassion for our feelings and our worries and our shaken world. He calls us to Himself with these beautiful, hope-giving words:

"'Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).""

Our world may shake, but if our foundation is built on Jesus, we are safe and secure. He will not be moved or shaken so we can hold onto Him with confidence—no matter what we are facing in this season. May these simple words and thoughts offer comfort and encouragement when your world shakes and threatens to bring you down with it. Hold fast to Jesus, trusting Him to see you through.

RPM

You Lead, I'll Follow

     Driving along the back country roads behind a friend of mine, I listened to my music and enjoyed the beautiful scenery that crisp, sunny fall day. The drive was easy, and we had enjoyed a great time out together shopping and catching up over lunch. I don't have the best sense of direction (that's an understatement), so I'm always happy to be the car that follows. We wind through the countryside until we come into a more suburban area where the road veers off in two directions. As I sing along to some of my favorite music, I find I'm driving in auto-pilot and quickly jump on the same road as my friend—only to have her call to remind me that I should have taken the other road to head toward my own home. It was an easy mistake—one that didn't have a real cost associated with it and was easily corrected. But this same scenario plays out in our lives in more meaningful ways than following a friend home from a day of catching up.

     Relationships usually work in the "follow and lead" pattern. Some of the worst moments of my growing up years resulted in disappointment and hurt when I was given "leads" without a real desire for my following. Whether it was my misinterpretation of the relationship or not, I found myself disillusioned and brokenhearted. Being led on is sadly common—even in Christian circles. The result is a bruised heart and oftentimes, bitter feelings. The fact is that "playing the field" or "leading someone on" is the way the world works but not the way we should behave as believers.

     Then we come to marriage—the institution designed by God that is beautiful and functions best when we follow the pattern God set for us. Too often there is a jostling for control in the relationship and that is not how God intended for it to be. Our modern mindset is that the word submission has a negative connotation.

By definition, submission is the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person (Oxford Languages Dictionary). 

    When we think of submission in biblical terms regarding marriage, it looks something like this: "a wife making a choice not to overtly resist her husband's will—not to say she cannot disagree or express her opinion (marriageministry.org)." In easier words, he has the responsibility of leadership in the home and the woman accepts his leadership and supports him. By no means does this mean a woman is oppressed or inferior in any way, but rather accepts the role God designed for her in the marriage as a supporter, helper and encourager. 

     But submission is not only for the wife—the husband will submit as well in fulfilling the woman's need to feel loved, protected and provided for. In many ways we can see it as a mutual act of serving one another, even as the bigger responsibilities lie on the husband's shoulders calling them to lead as we follow and give them needed help. This lead and follow pattern is also present in our relationship with Christ—He leads and we are to follow.

     We often balk at the act of following. We like to feel that we are in control and are the one calling the shots. Many times we feel that way because we want our own way and are motivated by selfishness, but as Christ followers we will recognize this as sinful and out of line with God's best design for us. 

     Maybe you're on autopilot in your marriage or your relationship with Christ and you're just bumping along without giving much thought to the course of your direction. May this be a time we can all reflect on who we are following—are we going the right way? Are we moving in the direction God is leading us? Or, are you pushing for control in your marriage and possibly using manipulation to get your way? I don't mind following one bit, but if I'm following the wrong person or have a bad attitude while I follow, I am not bringing pleasure to my Heavenly Father Who created me for something better—something that shows my willingness to serve out of love. May I learn to lead or follow—whichever role God has placed me in, and may I do it for the glory of God. 

But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God (1 Corinthians 11:3, ESV).

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord (Colossians 3:18, ESV).

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25, ESV),

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives (1 Peter 3:1, ESV),

     

     

Wedding Planning

 As the 31st of July approaches at the speed of a freight train, we are all about wedding planning around here. As the family of the groom, we certainly have less on our plates to handle, but there is still a lot going on to prepare for the big day. From rehearsal dinner menus and guest lists, to all the right clothing for the family, that's just the start to what we've been up to. The thing is, wedding planning is pretty fun, even though it's also pretty expensive. But if no effort is put into the planning, the day won't go smoothly and it wouldn't be nearly as enjoyable for the bride, groom or any of the guests. 

All of this commotion has got me thinking about something, though. As special as this wedding is, it pales in comparison to the wedding we will be a part of as believers in Christ Jesus. This celebration just gives a small peek into something much bigger and much more meaningful—the wedding where all of us are the Bride of Christ. The one really big difference is this: the Groom did most of the work and this work was costly beyond our scope of understanding.

In order for us to be a part of the bride of Christ, we had to be redeemed. This redemption cost God His only Son, Jesus, dying on the cross to offer us all the priceless gift of salvation. After His death, He was resurrected and ascended into Heaven where He went to prepare a place for us—you, me and every believer in Christ. He stated that He would "go to prepare a mansion for us." And so we can trust that this is exactly what He is doing as we wait here for Him to rapture His church. So we can see how He is doing His part to bring us into the marriage celebration in Heaven, but what about me? What about you? What are we doing to prepare for that wedding in the sky?

In all honesty, it's humbling to admit that I am not preparing at the same feverish pitch as I am for my son's wedding. It's like I think I have my whole life to prepare—but we have no idea how long we have before God calls us home. I have today, I have now, but that's all I can be sure of. So in these days or moments or years, I need to be preparing for my Groom—but what does that look like?

We put a lot of focus on the Bride in our worldly weddings. Their dress, hair, make-up and jewelry are all well thought out. We hire stylists and make-up artists. We get alterations until the dress fits perfectly. We shop around until we find the perfect pair of shoes. All of this is important, but quite different from how we prepare for our heavenly Bridegroom. Our preparation involves work on our hearts and our willing obedience to living to serve our Lord. 

Should Jesus call us home today—or if it is your last day here, how do you look from our Groom's perspective? While His blood covers our sin and cleanses us, we still are responsible for how we lived and loved. Would you feel prepared to meet Him today, or would you feel regret at misplaced attention on less important things? This gives me pause as I write this, because it's clear to me that I have much more I wish to do for the Lord and yet I'm pouring a great deal of attention in places that don't reap an eternal reward. 

I'm looking forward to July 31st—for sure. It's a day to celebrate these two people we love and their love for one another. But the day will come when I will meet my own heavenly Bridegroom—Jesus. I want to be ready for that day, and I don't want to feel unprepared when I stand before Him. And so I have work to do to prepare for that wedding in Heaven—I have serving and following and loving left to do in abundance. Not for my sake, no, but for the purpose of fulfilling my calling in the family of Christ. 

And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also (John 14:3, ESV).

Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure"—for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. And the angel said to me, "Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb." And he said to me, "These are the true words of God (Revelation 19:7-9, ESV)."

Dear Heavenly Father, help us be more aware of the preparation we should be doing as we prepare to be called home to You. The biggest wedding celebration ever will be our wedding to You–our Perfect and Precious Bridegroom. May it not be true that we stand before You fully unprepared with empty hands and hallow hearts. In Your name we pray, Amen!

Passing Through the Waters

 

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you (Isaiah 43:2, ESV).

With the enemy thundering at their heels, the Children of Israel rushed forward hoping for an escape from Pharaoh's army. The Egyptians had set them free, only to change their minds and pursue them on their flight from bondage. God had delivered them—or so they thought. As they were pursued, they came to a roadblock. The Red Sea lay before them and the enemy behind. They were trapped. Fear, doubt, anger and uncertainty likely held each of them captive. Why would God deliver them only to bring them to certain death at the banks of the sea?

"Then Moses stretched out his hand over the sea, and the Lord drove the sea back by a strong east wind all night and made the sea dry land, and the waters were divided (Exodus 14:21, ESV)."

Deliverance came for them through the gracious hand of God and their enemies perished in the waters as they closed on those Egyptians. The waters did not overwhelm them.

Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego refused to kneel down to the golden image King Nebuchadnezzar had made. Refusal to worship this false god would result in a serious punishment—they would be thrown into a fiery furnace. What a terrifying verdict, and yet when we read further we read these words in Scripture:

"Then King Nebuchadnezzar was astonished and rose up in haste. He declared to his counselors, "Did we not cast three men bound into the fire?" They answered and said to the king, "True, O king." He answered and said, "But I see four men unbound, walking in the midst of the fire, and they are not hurt; and the appearance of the fourth is like a son of the gods (Daniel 3:24-25, ESV).""

Deliverance came for these men through the gracious hand of God for their faithfulness to Him. The fire did not consume them.

What waters are you currently facing? Is there something you're facing that seems impossible? Do you feel trapped by your circumstances and can't seem to find a way out? Is it finances? An addiction? A troubled relationship? An affair? Or maybe you're facing foreclosure. What waters have you feeling fearful and discouraged?

What fires are you facing? The loss of a loved one? An unfaithful spouse who abandoned you? A pregnancy that is seriously in jeopardy? A family scandal or job insecurity? Do you feel the heat and wonder how you'll ever survive it? 

Deliverance doesn't always look like we think it should, but the God who parted that sea, and the same God who walked through the fire with those Hebrew men is still God today. When waters or fires threaten to consume and overwhelm us, He is our only solid answer and the only true Source of hope. 

May we be encouraged today in trusting that God knows our situation and He also knows our need. While He won't always remove hardships we experience, He will always meet us in the middle of them. He does always give us the strength and courage we need to face our trials and in these trials we face the promised refining—being made more like Jesus each day.

The Inadequacy of the Messenger

 For anyone who knows me well, you know I'm a big fan of listening to Chip Ingram from Living on the Edge Ministries. It's a great way to get my day started, and I am daily challenged by his teaching. One of his messages recently broadcasted, really struck a chord with me. The point he chose to drive home was this: the power of the gospel is in the message, not the messenger.

Maybe like me, you often feel inadequate to share the good news of the gospel  with others. You feel that one better suited may be the preacher in your church, the famous author who cranks out best sellers, or the missionary with the huge following in remote areas across the globe. It's easy to feel that they have a much larger platform, making us feel inferior to share the best news we know. 

Somedays it is hard as I approach even a simple blog post. Does what I say even matter? So many other authors are so much better at writing than I am. Even within the ministry of the devotional website I manage, I wonder at times if it's making a difference. And maybe you wonder the same in your circle of influence. It can cause feelings of insecurity or insignificance that comes from one source: Satan. 

Maybe you don't write, speak publicly or have a specific mission you're involved in. But here is the encouragement for you—you still carry the Voice of the Messenger. Whatever you feels disqualifies you is simply inaccurate. Think of who Jesus used to get the Message out to the world—He used simple fisherman. He used people who had betrayed Him. He wasn't looking for the most eloquent speaker or the most educated to share His message—He was simply looking for people who would be obedient to the calling to share. 

Honestly, I've used the mentality of "let my life be my testimony" method when in reality, I lack the courage of speaking out—of allowing His message to escape my inadequate lips. I also feel there must be a million other more capable people to spread His Word, and that's because I also fail to remember the lesson behind Chip's message: the power is in the gospel! This levels the playing field and equips all of us who believe to have the ability to share, knowing God will handle the rest. 

I don't know about you, but that takes a lot of pressure off for me. I don't see myself as being a great evangelist with a host of hungry hearts hanging onto my every word—but that's okay! I don't have a best seller out there, even though I do enjoy writing—but that's okay! I don't have a large platform of people, but if I obediently share with the few in my circle of influence then God can bless that. That's because it's His Word and He doesn't need me to do anything spectacular, the gospel is spectacular on It's own! 

So if you have days like I do, where you feel unable or unsure that you have much of a voice when it comes to sharing the gospel, don't let that discourage you. Instead, pray that God will open opportunity for you to speak to even just one. If only one person came to salvation through your simple obedience to share the message, then God did a great work through your obedience. We don't need big. We don't need fanfare. The gospel is where the power is; it's not in us. Today I challenge you to pray for courage to share this Good News—even if it's just with one person. Pray that God will equip you as the messenger, and that His power will work through the Message of the Gospel, transforming lives. What a privilege it is to share the best news we know!

Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous works among all the peoples (Psalm 96:3, ESV)!

And he said to them, "Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation (Mark 16:15, ESV).

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek (Romans 1:16, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, equip us as messengers to share Your Message, and may we remember that the power lies within the gospel, not ourselves. In Your name we pray, Amen!

The Gift of My Son

 Our house is full of wedding plans. This is a first for us, and it's baffling how much planning is packed into saying "I Do"! But it's mostly fun stuff and we are happy to do what it takes to give our only son a proper sendoff into his own life with his own wife. But some days it touches my heart how this little boy, grown into a man seldom leans on me these days. Yes, that's the way it's supposed to be, but I treasure memories of the little boy who never wanted to grow up so he could stay with me forever. And I'm so, so incredibly grateful for the years I've had him home with me—those are years I will forever treasure in my heart.

It all started close to twenty-five years ago. The effort and tears and prayers and love all poured into him in hopes of giving him the very best foundation to start his own family. Sure I've made mistakes along the way, but never did my heart stray from only wishing him the best and wanting a great future for him. And so the effort of raising a good man was never wasted, and while no one is perfect I'm awfully proud of my son. 

Now the purpose of this post isn't to make you roll your eyes or gag at the mushiness, but rather to show how our children are a gift—not only to us but to their future spouse. If I allow laziness, disrespect and unkindness to be overlooked and shrug my shoulders at it, I do a disservice to their future spouse. Greed, grudge holding and no spiritual foundation will not make him the man I want for his wife. And so we have a huge responsibility as parents to make humans that will be respectful, helpful and tender spouses. 

The days are counting down until the day I will watch him take his girl as his wife. In that moment I'll nearly bust with pride and emotion, but I'll also give one of the greatest gifts I have to give—the gift of my son. I hope that in him I've instilled a sense of being the best husband he can be and in time, Lord willing, the best dad he can be. Those character traits have hopefully been formed in him, even as most came at the surrender of worn knees and heavenly pleas. He is one of my most valuable treasures and when I stop to think of this, I'm taken to Calvary.

God sent His only precious, highly treasured Son to a cruel cross to die in my place. Not because I'm a "good" person because I surely am not, but because of my great sin that separated me from a holy God. His Son was everything perfect and everything holy yet He gave Him willingly out of a love for us greater than our understanding. He gave me the gift of His Son. It was the single-most selfless sacrifice and one that provided everything I could ever need to secure my eternal pardon. He didn't make mistakes along the way and offer the best He could manage—He offered a perfect Son for a sinful creation. So while I offer my own son, filled with humanity's sinful imperfections, He offered the only perfect Son for me—for you!

When the day comes for me to celebrate the giving of my son to his beautiful bride, I hope I can take a few moments that day to reflect on God's Son being given to me. Giving something of great value has a high cost. In God's case, no higher cost could have been paid—He gave us the very best. And while my own son is no match to the cost paid through Jesus on the cross, he is my only boy–the son of my own heart. I'm not a person of great wealth or prestige—my children far excel over any earthly goods I could offer. As my heart thinks on these things, may it be touched with the price He paid for me through His own Son, Jesus. Thank You, Lord for your indescribable gift—my heart is humbled anew at Your great love for me. 

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward (Psalm 127:3, ESV).

And behold, a voice from heaven said, "This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased (Matthew 3:17, ESV)."

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father we thank You for the gift of Your Son, given up to the cross in order to rescue us from sin. Your love exceeds our understanding and our hearts are warmed by You. In Your name we pray, Amen!

Where I Belong

 I walked into the room full of men and women with a dry mouth and a pounding heart. I knew no one and felt completely out of my element. Everyone was mingling, engrossed in groups of conversation. Coffee in hand, I glanced around the room looking for even one person that was alone only to find none. Why had I come, I wondered? I would do about anything to be home right now and not standing awkwardly outside of my comfort zone. I made eye contact with a few people as I slowly walked the perimeter, but didn't seem to connect with anyone. Finding my way to a seat, I tried to look confident and comfortable alone with my coffee. Pretending to peruse my social media thread, I mentally ticked the amount of time I would spend in this uncomfortable place.

Have you ever felt out of place—like a fish out of water? As I've gotten older I've gotten much better at being "good" with new situations, but they still cause a little anxiety for me. These are the thoughts that whirled through my mind as I thought this week of Ruth (not myself, but the Old Testament version of Ruth). As a Moabite woman, she left behind her family and her heritage for something completely different when she married Mahlon. As an Israelite family from Bethlehem, Mahlon's family was unlike the Moabite family Ruth would have been raised in. After a short time together, Ruth became a widow along with her mother-in-law and sister-in-law as all three lost their husbands.

Naomi, Ruth's mother-in-law, encouraged Ruth to return to her family and her homeland. This would have been more comfortable, perhaps, but it wasn't what Ruth believed to be right. Somewhere along the way, Ruth saw that Mahlon's family served the true God, and she loved Naomi and was willing to leave all she knew to follow her to a whole new place. But how did she feel in her heart as she set out for this city she knew nothing about nor anyone who lived there, apart from Naomi? I'm guessing she felt a little like I did in that room full of strangers, yet her resolve was firmly in place to follow Naomi wherever she decided to go.

Ruth wasn't an Israelite, but God didn't exclude her from His people because she had a different nationality. In fact, He made a place in His own family for her. How so? By weaving her into the very bloodline that would lead to the birth of Jesus Christ. I find this very special as well as encouraging for those of us who are Gentiles. While God chose the Israelites to be His chosen people, He opened up the way for those who sought Him—regardless of their lineage. His heart always craved a heart who desired Him. Rahab, another Old Testament woman with a sordid past was not a Jew either, yet she also shared in the bloodline that led to the birth of the Messiah. 

When we come into the New Testament, we see the open door for the Gentiles through Paul's preaching. The gospel was for everyone—even me. No matter your skin color or the country you were born and raised in, you're welcome in the family of God. If you have a colorful past or a family full of crooks, you're welcome in the family of God. He doesn't exclude—we do that. It's precious to think that God desires us and that as His children we are always wanted—we never have to worry about fitting in or feeling like a misfit. 

Do you ever feel a little lost in this world, overcome by feelings of inadequacy? Do you ever feel alone and out of your element? Humans judge and accept us based on their perceptions of us, but God accepts us based on something better—the shed blood of His Son on the cross of Calvary. If ever love was perfectly displayed, it was there on that cross. Through His invitation to come, it points to His intense desire for us. We will forever belong to Him and we never have to feel insecure or alone. Ruth was engrafted into His family despite her nationality. While she was considered a "foreigner", God saw her as a daughter. There are a million reasons why I shouldn't be accepted into God's family, but His love covers them all. I am chosen, wanted and fully accepted as a daughter in God's family—what a tremendous privilege and blessing it is.

Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all (Colossians 3:11, ESV).

Therefore let it be known to you that this salvation of God has been sent to the Gentiles; they will listen (Acts 28:28, ESV)."

And I have other sheep that are not of this fold. I must bring them also, and they will listen to my voice. So there will be one flock, one shepherd (John 10:16, ESV).

The Things that Got Better

 While it's true that somethings get worse with the passing of time, I'm thankful that some things get better. I can easily think of things that have gotten worse as I've grown up. For example, the change in social connection from the overuse of technology—there isn't anything like face-to-face interaction. Through written text, you miss the tone of the words spoken and the emotions of the person you're speaking to. In our era it's harder to develop communication skills that are vital to lasting, healthy relationships. 

My childhood days look so different from modern day childhood. We played outside until dark and were safe to ride our bikes a mile away and not have worried parents that we would be abducted or killed. Not that it never happened, but certainly less than today. We drank from water hoses, got spanked for misbehavior, and couldn't be contacted by our friends unless they phoned our home or rang the doorbell. It was a different world—one that was safer and in my opinion, a lot more fun. This is an area where change over the years was not for the greater good, and I think many would agree with that.

But I think back to thoughts from some Christians that were standard when I was younger that have changed for the better in many places around the globe. A "good" Christian was marked by their outward appearance much more than the state of their heart. Make-up was worldly. Women wearing pants raised eyebrows. Missing church for viable reasons was frowned upon. Jewelry—no! And on and on the list could go. So much of our christianity was placed on our physical appearance and not on spiritual transformation. Not that the inner heart won't spill over into our exterior, but too often being "godly" meant following a list of legalistic rules. Maybe you didn't grow up with this as the norm but many did.

While this is in no way excusing immodesty or irreverence, there is much to be said for turning away others by legalism (rules based on personal preferences). The true character of a Christian should be seen in how we communicate with others, compassionately seek to help and understand others, and lovingly share the gospel with those who are lost. It's displayed in the heart of one who seeks the good of others above themselves. It's in the acts of kindness toward strangers and loved ones alike. It's being the hands and feet of Jesus as we serve those we rub shoulders with. 

While I'm no longer a "young person", I find many of them refreshing these days. I see our own youth serving the Lord by reaching out to the younger kids in our community, teaching them about Jesus and showing a real care for them. I see them brushing away the "rules" of the past for something better—a heart willing to serve. I see them stepping up to help someone who needs encouragement, a babysitter, or help with a broken down car. I watch them and feel encouraged and hopeful that they are connecting with the call to be Christlike—loving and caring for the needs of others. And this does something to their outward appearance too—they exude joy. 

Some things do get worse with time, but I'm thankful for the things that get better. They give me hope and it warms my heart to see how all these centuries later, the Holy Spirit is still thriving in the hearts of many. Our world overall is certainly not improving and can discourage us when we see all that is happening around us, but God is still actively working and using His people to fulfill His purposes. May we place value on changed hearts over something less important. May we look closer than our outside judgments about another Christian and search instead for a changed life. And may we seek to have a heart like our Jesus and show kindness, grace and compassion to a hurting, sinful world. They need us, and they need God's love demonstrated through us and it should be our privilege to do just that.  

For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast (Ephesians 2:8-9, ESV).

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path (Psalm 119:105, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, help us to have gracious hearts that really see the hearts of others. May we push aside the temptation to pass judgment solely based on appearance, and may we ourselves have hearts that reflect Your light and love for others. May others identify us as Your children because of how we act. In Your name we pray, Amen.

 

Exercising Faith-What Does it Mean?

 Circuit training—a phrase that brings up bad memories from the past. With multiple weight machines set up in close proximity, you basically run from one to the next, and on and on it goes for about 45 minutes or so. The first few sets were typically done quite easily, as the weight is lighter than regular lifting, but as you worked through each machine and your heart rate steadily punched upward, I would begin questioning what in the world had ever prompted me to begin in the first place. This was exercise not intended for the faint of heart—but for the dedicated athlete.

Now Zumba—that's my kind of workout, but even with Zumba I struggled initially to learn the dance steps and to build up my stamina and confidence. No proper form of exercise comes without a learning curve and a period of adjustment—physical and mental, but with perseverance, you make strides as you keep at it. And when you think about it, faith is no different. I wasn't born trusting God and automatically knowing how to live as a transformed believer of Jesus—it was through many small experiences over time that I learned those things and continue to do so.

Building, or exercising our faith requires spiritual muscle development. It won't just happen unless you put in effort. You will never accidentally fall into being a person of great faith. And so it takes deliberate practice, just like any other form of exercise. Many times, I am guilty of praying for a greater faith, then being puzzled and frustrated with trial after trial. If you want to be a person of great faith, trials aren't optional. That teenager that's giving you a hard time? Faith building. That church leader that seems to make rules based on personal preference causing you irritation? Faith building. A spouse who runs to another's arms, devastating your heart? Faith building. Bills that are out of sync with your income? Faith building.

When you think of people in Scripture known for their faith, you'll see they were people who faced pretty difficult situations. Abraham was asked to offer his son. Esther came before the king unannounced with a desire to save her people—an action that could easily cost her life. Joshua instructed the people to march around the walls of Jericho, believing that God would spare them from harm and give the city into their hands. David picked up a small rock and faced a large giant who wanted to kill him. Moses led his people into the middle of the sea, believing God would hold back the waters from destroying them. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego refused to worship an idol and walked inside a fiery furnace, not knowing if they would be delivered or not. 

All of these people are known for their faith—yet each one faced their own trials with confidence in God. It's true that trials stink. I know I don't like them and I bet you don't either. But trials are necessary if we want to truly grow in our faith and learn to trust our Heavenly Father. Without them, we would not learn to rely on His strength to see us through, and we would not grow in our faith. 

What are you facing today that you are wrestling against? Are you feeling bitter or angry that God allowed this situation in your life? Honestly, there are those moments we find ourselves angry with God—and yet He understands our emotions and feels compassion for us. But as a loving Father, He wants more for us than an easy life that won't encourage our spiritual growth and build our faith. When I think of people I have known who have passed away, the ones with the most powerful legacy are those who faced challenges and continued to walk in faith. So when we face things we wish we weren't called to face, may we see how God is exercising our faith by allowing things that have a greater purpose than the pain we are experiencing in that season. Our God is good and He deeply loves us. Even when our life gets hard and our hearts are hurting. May it be said of us when we take our last breath, "their faith is what I remember and appreciate the most". 

And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him (Hebrews 11:6, ESV).

That your faith may not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God (1 Corinthians 2:5, ESV).

For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith (1 John 5:4, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, we want to be people known for our faith, and yet our hearts often struggle with trials. Help us in those hard seasons to trust You and believe that You will bring good from whatever we face. We know that faith building isn't easy and requires trials and so we ask that when we face them, we would learn to wholly lean on You. In Your name we pray, Amen!

Harsh Words Damage Relationships

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1).
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear (Ephesians 4:29, ESV).
A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back (Proverbs 29:11, ESV).
There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing (Proverbs 12:18, ESV).

Can you remember all the great things people have said about you through your life? I know I can remember a few—especially those said by someone that oftentimes isn’t complimentary. I remember praise for accomplishing certain milestones or tasks, and I remember promises made involving serious things like marriage vows. I remember whispered words of encouragement when I was walking through some very difficult moments in life, but man oh man I remember harsh words.

Why is it that the really bad things we have heard stick with us, filling us with whispers of doubt and fear in moments of weakness? They lay under the surface of our thoughts, easily erupting when we need them the least. It should give us great pause before we allow ourselves to speak, knowing the impact can last for decades—sometimes even forever. 

Rash words really are often like sword thrusts, aiming at our hearts and wounding oftentimes more seriously than a physical injury. Learning to rein in our words should be constant. At any moment given the wrong situation, we can so easily lash out with hurtful comments. This is often especially true with those closest to us—the ones we know love us most and will forgive our verbal jabs. I find this is fairly common among couples learning to live side by side, day after day.

Stressful situations can lead us to be careless with our words. Feeling hungry, sleepy or ill can also lead us to snap or say something rude or unkind. When we use words that are harsh or unkind, Scripture says we speak as a fool. These words have consequences and reveal the state of our hearts. If you’re known as one that can aptly cut with your words in a clever, sarcastic or cruel way, you are not a picture of Christ.

Our society places value on sarcasm and criticism, but within a marriage or any relationship, that form of speech damages and tears down. Our speech, as believers, should build up and encourage. As I write this, I am convicted when I think of the many times I have used clever, cutting words and felt almost proud of how I put someone in their place. May God change our hearts and may we be convicted of our speech when it falls short.

Marriages need kindness. Your spouse needs words that affirm and encourage. There is no situation where we are justified in using harsh language. My challenge to each of us today is to pay attention to our words. What tone are you using when you speak? Is what you’re saying beneficial or destructive? Words are often forgotten, but I think it’s so important to know that harsh words spoken are often remembered for many years, causing bitterness, along with emotional and mental pain. Speak kindly, and by doing so, it will reveal the Spirit of God within you. 

I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak (Matthew 12:36, ESV),

 

I am Thomas

I sat beside his bed, holding the hand of my husband. Thirty years of doing life together conjured up so many rich memories. How could I go on without him, I wondered? We were a team—partners, lovers, and best friends. And now this. The doctors had given us news that literally shook us: stage 4 cancer. How are you supposed to handle that kind of news? 

In another home across the world a woman sat alone. Fearful and heartbroken, she faced the awful news that her husband had left her. The clothes and books and his well-worn recliner seemed to mock her in his absence. Was it over? Would things ever be okay again? How was she supposed to move forward alone? She missed him desperately, yet here she was—broken and filled with doubt.

Centuries earlier, a similar situation played out in a distant land. As he looked on, he saw his friend hanging on a cross. Broken and bloodied and dying. It wasn't supposed to be this way. He had placed all of his faith in this Man, and now He was dying—leaving them and shattering his hopes that Jesus was truly the long-awaited Messiah. Why had he been so foolish to believe, he thought to himself? Why did it have to end this way?

The disciples were gathered together and Jesus appeared to them after that awful day of His death. While Jesus had told them prior to His death that He would indeed die and raise from the dead, they didn't understand what He meant. So when they saw Him, their hope was restored—He really was the Messiah. He really was Who they had believed Him to be. This caused them great joy and I'm sure, a huge sense of relief. But Thomas wasn't there. He didn't get to see Him, and when he was told that Jesus had appeared to them, he refused to believe it.

Not only did Thomas refuse to believe the news, but he adamantly refused. In fact, these are his words:

"Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe (John 20:25, ESV)."  Never.

Eight days later, Jesus appeared to His disciples again, except this time Thomas was with them. How do you think Thomas felt when Jesus, knowing his heart and his words, asked him to place his finger in the nail print in his hand and to place his hand on His side and feel the place where the sword had pierced Him? I would imagine in that moment, Thomas felt an ocean full of regret and sorrow. He had doubted the Lord, and the Lord had called him out on it. Not in a mean way—but in a very direct way. And Jesus then told Thomas: "Do not disbelieve, but believe (John 20:27b, ESV)." 

It's so easy to point fingers at Thomas and judge him for his doubting heart. How could he have seen the works of the Lord and then doubt His identity? He had watched Him perform many miracles in the three years he spent with Him—healing people, feeding multitudes from only a few loaves and fish, raising people from the dead. How could he have been an eye-witness to these miraculous acts, only to doubt Him as He hung on the cross? It seems foolish, and yet I've been there, and maybe you have too.

The truth is, God heals cancer. God restores broken marriages. God gives the addict freedom from substance abuse. God makes a way when it seems there is none. God cures. God rescues. That's what He does, and I often easily forget that when I'm faced with situations that seem absolutely impossible. I doubt Him. I forget what He's done. I'm no different or better than Thomas.

But Thomas didn't stay a doubter. After he touched the wounds of Jesus, he appropriately addressed Him as "my Lord and my God." History records that later Thomas would lose his life as a martyr. He could have stayed in a place of disbelief, but he didn't—and I don't have to stay in a place of doubt either. Why? Because I've personally seen the hand of Jesus miraculously move in my own life. I've had a front row seat to witnessing the power of God transform people—transform my marriage, and transform lives. When I stop to consider these things I can release worry and doubt that grips my heart when I'm the one sitting by the hospital bed or facing an unfaithful spouse or a child addicted to drugs. Is it hard—yes. Does it hurt—absolutely. But I serve a God who is able.

Even though He is able, God doesn't always heal that stage 4 husband. He doesn't always bring back a wayward child or spouse. The addict will take the final dose that takes their life. Our world is broken, and sin has touched every part of it. But as believers, we don't have to live in a place of doubt. God will make all things new and restore His creation. He cares about us and wants us to hope in Him. He can do all things, and in His strength, so can we. And sometimes–somedays, that's enough to remove every bit of doubt from our hearts no matter what we are facing. May we, like Thomas remember—truly see Him, and then address Him as our Lord and our God. 

But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind (James 1:6, ESV). 

Truly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be taken up and thrown into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him (Mark 11:23, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, help us to be remembered by our faith, and not our doubts. May we be Christians that leave a legacy that says "they trusted in God, and lived it." In Your name we pray, Amen!

Comfortable Me

 It had been a long day full of working in the yard in the North Carolina heat. Our heat is heat you swim around in—thick, humid and dehydrating. My body finds extremes harder and harder as it ages and a whole day on my feet against the elements quickly saps my energy. But all along I kept pushing myself while I mentally reminded myself that at the end of it all, there would be rest and comfort.

Shedding my sweaty, dirty clothes, I stepped into a cool shower; washing away heat, dirt and weariness. Even just this simple process of getting clean began reviving my spirit. My favorite lounge clothes, a soft blanket on my couch, and a cold drink made me sigh with relief. This was what I had pictured all along, waiting for me at the end of the day. It's what pushed me through when I felt like quitting and putting off the work for another day.

Comfort has been a topic that has been popping up in my life lately. I've had devotionals focus on it and a sermon about it this past Sunday. It's made me pay attention to the topic and give it some extra thought. Comfort is something my body and spirit crave, yet when I think of Jesus' life here, He had very little of it. Jesus was often weary as people clamored for His attention and rest was not in abundance for Him. As far as personal comforts, we know He had little of that as well, knowing the work His Father sent Him to do was the focus of His life and ministry.

We never read that Jesus was grumpy and rude because He was not comfortable. He didn't act poorly because He was too hot, too hungry, or tired. But I do. I have a strong desire for comfort and when I lack it, I often become upset and cranky. I think one of the biggest reasons for this is because I'm selfish in nature—I feel entitled to feel comfortable and when I don't, I get irritable.

Comfort isn't wrong, it's just that my thoughts about it often get turned around a little. God doesn't dislike the fact that I appreciate my bed, a warm shower and a good meal—but I'm not actually entitled to those things; they are a blessing given to me from His gracious hand. My thoughts of comfort should instead be "others oriented". That means that my motivation for comfort should shift from myself, to the comfort of people around me.

I think of the many times people have ministered to my need for comfort when I've been upset or sad. They have sat with me, prayed with me, and brought things to me that would offer care and love. There is nothing like the hug from a loved one when we are faced with something emotionally challenging. A warm meal dropped off from a caring friend offers comfort that is hard to match. These are ways we can comfort others and in doing so, be more like Jesus.

The Holy Spirit has many names—one being Comforter. I cannot even begin to name the ways He has proven this to be true in my own life. His Word is full of comfort and encouragement and I've leaned heavily on Scripture to receive His comfort. Being able to pray to the Father gives us a great source of comfort and relief. The simple act of laying our burdens at His feet means laying aside troublesome thoughts and resting in His ability to handle them all for us.

While I'll forever be a gal here that longs for a soft blanket, a comfy spot to rest a while, and a warm fire on a cold night, I hope my thoughts of comfort shift. I hope that I'll realize how important it is to seek the comfort of others above my own. May I be a source of comfort to those around me that have real needs and desire someone to draw alongside and just offer them love and care–even if it costs me my own personal comfort to do so. If I stay in my place of comfort, I'll not be used in the capacity that God longs to use me. I must throw aside that soft blanket and cup of coffee and really see what's going on around me. Only when I put aside my own comforts will I be able to actively pursue meeting the needs of others. May God help me to be less selfish and more of a servant.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4, ESV).

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18, ESV).

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, help me shift my focus for personal comfort to meeting the needs of those who need comfort from me. Help me to follow Your example and offer love and encouragement to those who need it most. In Your name I pray, Amen!