When health issues assault a loved one, we work hard to make life comfortable for them. We drive them to appointments, we lighten their work load, we buy them gifts, and offer them unlimited support. We shave our heads so they aren't bald alone, we encourage them to seek counseling, or try eating the same heart healthy diet. We cry with them, listen to them, and try our best to understand, on some level, the journey they are on. Why do we do it? Because we love them, and their pain is personal to us. Our compassion capacity is "all in" for them, and we make sure they know it.
Why then, do we have such a hard time feeling compassion when the sickness isn't physical?. What about when the sickness is spiritual in nature? Why do we so easily walk away, offering little to those we claim to love? When we are able to see infidelity, among other spiritual struggles, as a real battle against our sinful flesh, it transforms how we see our spouse. Yes- what they have done has caused a great deal of pain, but it often wasn't intentional, but rather the result of the "slow fade" Casting Crowns sings about.
Many have asked, through our own journey through infidelity, how I felt about my husband during those difficult months and years. Choosing to feel bitterness and focus on the anger, would result in my own "slow fade". These feelings are not meant to be a part of who we are, as Christians, even though anger has its place in any affair. But when I chose to look on my husband with eyes of compassion for his fall, it changed my way of thinking altogether. This man that I loved, was in a crisis, and by golly, I wanted to help him! If we all walked away from those who have fallen and are broken, then we are quitters. We are prideful. We are hard-hearted. We are missing the call of the gospel.
If you know someone who has fallen away from their faith, struggling against their flesh and the devil, and walking in ways contrary to scripture, can I ask you to show them compassion? Pity and feeling sorry for them isn't the same being compassionate. Pity involves pride, while compassion understands our own ability to fall- choose compassion over pity! They are spiritually sick, and they need help. They need love. They need wise counsel. They need a hug. They desperately need prayer. They need the body of Christ more than ever before. Please don't neglect those who are floundering in their faith. What I realized is this- I am capable of the same fall. My sincere hope is that should it ever happen, you will faithfully pursue my restoration. Your help may not be accepted for a long time, or possibly ever, but God has called us to live out the gospel. This doesn't only pertain to the lost, but also to those who have fallen away. God never turns His back on us when we fail or fall, and I pray I will live out that same principle in my own life, regarding others! See them with eyes like Jesus, and you'll start to see that they look an awful lot like you.
Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, Colossians 3:12 ESV
"So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12 ESV
Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. 1 Peter 3:8 ESV
"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God. Matthew 5:9 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, may we train our eyes to see others with compassionate eyes, like Yours. It's so easy to dismiss those who have hurt us, refusing to restore relationships, and seeking revenge, instead. Help us to see the hurting, even though they have hurt us, too. God, help us to draw alongside the spiritually ill, and love them through it. In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen!
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