The Reality as Christ Followers

 What does it really look like to follow Jesus? I think Christians today have a distorted view of what their life should be like as Christ followers. From the perversion of prosperity gospel, many have come to feel that the Christian life should be easy if we simply try to keep the rules. Give, and you'll be wealthy. Give, and you'll be healthy. Give, and God will bless your family and marriage and everything will go just as you dreamed it would. Is this biblical, or is it full of misconceptions and empty promises?

The best way to answer this in short is to look at Scripture. What does the Bible tell us to expect as Christians? Here are a few scriptures to consider:

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world (John 16:33). The Bible says as Christ followers, we will have tribulation—we can expect it! But it also tells us that even then, we can still feel the peace of knowing He is with us and will overcome the world.

And he said to them, "Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions (Luke 12:15)." The Bible says an abundance of possessions will only lead us to coveting; jealous thoughts and sin. God doesn't ever say we will have everything we want, in fact, the more we have, the less we realize our need for Him.

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us (Romans 8:18). The Bible says we will suffer at times, but to remember the eternal hope that awaits us in glory.

Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2). The Bible says we should help bear one another's burdens—which shows us that burdens are part of life as a Christ follower.

Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)." The Bible says that loving money should not be part of our Christian experience. Instead, we should be content with what we have—not desiring earthly riches, but instead, remembering our wealth is found in our eternal inheritance.

I have been a Christ follower now for a little over 39 years! In that time, I've experienced some real honest-to-goodness hard seasons. I've seen so many other Christians experience really difficult trials, some personally, and some in those they love—sickness, death, bankruptcy, addiction, infidelity, betrayal, unemployment, and more. I haven't yet met a Christian who navigated life unscathed—no trials or difficulties. Sin has broken this world, and none of us are exempt from the consequences. 

If Christianity meant life would go smoothly, then the world would explode with followers—but the emphasis would be on the absence of trials and not on the Person we follow. God wants us to want Him for Who He is and what He did on the cross for us—not for personal gain or an easy life. The truth is, life is difficult, but as Christ followers we have a real Resource for help. Jesus left this earth when He was taken up into Heaven after His resurrection. But He did not leave us. Instead, He sent His Holy Spirit to live inside of every believer, giving us help through life's most difficult challenges. 

So if you are a Christ follower and life has had its harder seasons, you're not alone. Our suffering here is but for a little while; our hope rests in our eternal home—a place free from sin's "side effects". If you've been promised that life as a Christian will go well if you just follow a few simple guidelines, you've been lied to. Prosperity gospel is rooted in mistruths and has led many astray. Without life's problems, we would not feel the need we have for Jesus—and we do need Him. Our challenges are a blessing in many ways for showing us the way to Christ. 

Dear Heavenly Father, we thank You for meeting our needs, yet reminding us that life isn't about the abundance of possessions. We thank You for those hard seasons, and for how they help us to grow and depend on You. In Jesus name we pray, Amen!

Are You a Baby?

     Can you imagine a world run by babies and toddlers? A world full of immaturity and pureed food? A world full of temper tantrums and shallow relationships? There would be no solid foundation or structure, and it would be a very frustrating place to live. Sadly, this is a reality of christianity today-a world where most who have legitimately come to Christ, have no real development or spiritual interest or growth. In fact, 8 out of 10 christians never go on to live a life for Jesus, and never have the discipline to develop past the baby stage of belief. A surrendered life doesn't look like that-it's a life that is marked by obedience and character that mirrors the character of Christ.

     If we want to grow up in our faith, we will need to surrender our bodies. We read in Romans chapter 12 that we are to present our bodies as a living sacrifice-holy and acceptable to God. We are further urged to resist conforming to the world, but to be transformed by the truth found in God's Word (see Romans 12:1-2). A surrendered life will be noticed and will usher us into the growing up stages of our spirituality. I'd like to discuss a few body parts we can surrender in order to grow in our faith.

     One part of the body that often leads us to sin is our eyes. One of my favorite scriptures regarding the eyes is found in Psalm 119:37. It says, "turn my eyes from looking at worthless things; and give me life in your ways." How many of us have gotten distracted from our christian journey by pornography, lust, and materialism? We see things we want, and we view things we shouldn't, and they lead us to spiritual ruin and heartache. When we fail to surrender our eyes, we open them to a world of trouble. 

     Feet that aren't surrendered will take us places we have no business going. These feet may lead us into sex outside of marriage, strip clubs, relationships that are unhealthy, and paths that are not led by the Spirit. Proverbs 4:26 tells us to "ponder the path of your feet; then all your ways will be sure." Where we go tells a lot about us, and when we fail to surrender our footpath, we will walk in ways that dishonor our Father and stunt our spiritual growth. 

     Failing to surrender our hands have gotten us in trouble more times than we care to admit. My earliest memories as a new christian at the age of 11, still involve fist fights with my siblings. Fighting, hurting others, and touching people we shouldn't touch are a few examples of failing to surrender our hands. Hands were never meant to hurt; but to work, soothe and give. 1 Timothy 5:22 reminds us "not to be hasty in the laying on of hands, nor take part in the sins of others; keep ourselves pure." Failing to surrender our hands will lead to hurt and broken relationships.

     The final body part we often fail to surrender is our mouth. Profanity, dirty jokes, insults, boasting, sarcasm, lies and gossip are all ways our mouth will show a life that is not surrendered. Sadly, this is often the reality for many of us and has no place in the life of a believer. A mouth that isn't reigned in by the Spirit will show the real health of our spiritual age. In Romans 3 we read that our "throat is an open grave; they use their tongues to deceive." We should not be marked as one who lies and uses profanity, but rather as one who speaks truth and speaks kindly to others. Surrendering our mouths is crucial if we ever want to mature spiritually. 

     It's sad to think of how many fail to grow beyond their conversion. We allow schedules, selfishness, and laziness to stand in the way of our spiritual development. It's easier to continue on the way we lived before, but when we do that, we dishonor the name of the One we claim to serve. Furthermore, we are missing out on being an active part of His kingdom work on earth, and the eternal rewards associated with being a willing follower of Jesus. We look for shortcuts in most areas of our lives, but when it comes to growing in Christ, we must be willing to surrender our own will and seek to follow the path God has for us. 

     When our life is over and our friends and family gather to speak about who we were, what will they say? Will we be known by our faith, and will others easily identify us as Christians? Will people say we spoke kindly of others and lived a life of integrity and honor? Will the way we loved others stand out? Will our children say we had a heart for Jesus, and lived in such a way that our decisions, words and actions reflected His heart? Or will we be like the 80% who never really grew in our faith and left behind a legacy that didn't mirror the life of Jesus? It's sobering to think of the day we will stand before Him and give an answer for how we lived and loved. And while I've failed often, I pray that I will daily surrender my will to His. I pray that I'll realize the value in pouring myself into His Word, and how powerful it is in transforming me. And I pray that when I'm gone, the talk around the room will be less about me and more about Him-because I can tell you, He is worth the surrender.

And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it (Luke 9:23-24, ESV). 

Dear Heavenly Father, help us to be disciplined enough to surrender our bodies and our lives to Your way for us. We often find ourselves in a place that is stagnant and we are not growing spiritually. Help us to lay aside our own ways for Yours. In Your name we pray, Amen!

     

Freedom or Shackles

     I don't know about you, but I've been missing my freedom lately. With the restrictions this virus has placed upon us, I've never spent so many consecutive days at home. I love my home, and it's a place I enjoy spending time, but lately I feel a little like a prisoner inside these 4 walls. I'm thankful for the time with family, and I'm thankful for the efforts of our government to keep us safe. But these restrictions have opened my eyes to what it must feel like to live a life of restrictions- either by government structure, or even as a prisoner. 
     Freedom is something every Christian enjoys when the shackles of our sin are removed through the gift of salvation. Our sin is heavy, and wears us down. Just as we feel an emotional weight when we wish to be forgiven in one of our earthly relationships, the same is true before we are set free from the guilt of our sin. There is something so freeing when we hear those sweet words from someone we hurt : "I forgive you!" We immediately feel lighter and more at peace. This is the feeling we experience when we received forgiveness from our Savior- a burden too heavy for words was lifted as a result of His mercy and grace.
     It's hard to return to bondage after freedom. I can't imagine the feelings of those who for short time, escaped from the evil power of Nazi rule, only to be captured once again. For most, it would've meant certain death for them, but at best, a return to the worst imaginable life of bondage in a concentration camp. Their return to bondage wasn't voluntary- they would have never chosen to go back, yet we often willingly return to bondage when we misuse our freedom in Christ, leading us back to sin's shackles.
     Scripture reminds us of the danger of returning to the lifestyle of the lost after salvation. We are essentially putting on filthy garments and shackles, after being clean and set free. It makes no sense, this desire to return to this unhealthy spiritual state, and yet we often do. In my own life experience, I've seen it play out in my marriage. After enjoying decades of living a godly and fulfilling married life, sinful flesh took over and corrupted what was. While it may initially feel like freedom to forsake the "bondage" of marriage and pursue worldly passion, it is actually a return to Satan's control in our decisions and choices. The result of returning to a lifestyle of bondage to sin, will always hurt people. 
     While our freedom is feeling a little compromised at present, it's a good time to take stock of how we are doing spiritually. Are we living free, or are we returning to the shackles that once held us in the past? Freedom in Christ does not mean that we get to do what we want, but rather a freedom we experience through His gift of salvation, releasing us from Satan's captivity. It frees us from the ultimate price of sin- hell for eternity. While our earthly freedom may be subject to circumstances, government and yes- even a virus, our spiritual freedom can never be taken from us. And that, to me, is the best news ever!

For if, after they have escaped the defilements of the world through the knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, they are again entangled in them and overcome, the last state has become worse for them than the first. For it would have been better for them never to have known the way of righteousness than after knowing it to turn back from the holy commandment delivered to them. What the true proverb says has happened to them: "The dog returns to its own vomit, and the sow, after washing herself, returns to wallow in the mire." 2 Peter 2:20-22 (ESV) 

Dear heavenly Father, we thank You for the freedom You have given us, and acknowledge the great cost it was to You- the blood of Your Son, Jesus, shed for us on the cross of Calvary. Help us to remember the danger of returning to bondage after receiving Your precious gift of freedom. In Your name we pray, Amen!

See Them with Different Eyes

     You hear the conversation from the other room, and your whole world spins out of control. Can it be true? Doesn't cancer happen to other people and their families? We never thought it would part of our journey- not now! Or the phone rings, and you hear words you hoped you would never hear- "your husband had a heart attack, and has been taken by ambulance to the local emergency department. Please come right away." Or your son is in a serious battle with depression, and you are desperate to get him help! These are moments that forever change our lives, and we feel compassion and a strong desire to do anything possible for them. We long to alleviate their pain and assist them in their health crisis. 
     When health issues assault a loved one, we work hard to make life comfortable for them. We drive them to appointments, we lighten their work load, we buy them gifts, and offer them unlimited support. We shave our heads so they aren't bald alone, we encourage them to seek counseling, or try eating the same heart healthy diet. We cry with them, listen to them, and try our best to understand, on some level, the journey they are on. Why do we do it? Because we love them, and their pain is personal to us. Our compassion capacity is "all in" for them, and we make sure they know it.
     Why then, do we have such a hard time feeling compassion when the sickness isn't physical?. What about when the sickness is spiritual in nature? Why do we so easily walk away, offering little to those we claim to love? When we are able to see infidelity, among other spiritual struggles, as a real battle against our sinful flesh, it transforms how we see our spouse. Yes- what they have done has caused a great deal of pain, but it often wasn't intentional, but rather the result of the "slow fade" Casting Crowns sings about. 
     Many have asked, through our own journey through infidelity, how I felt about my husband during those difficult months and years. Choosing to feel bitterness and focus on the anger, would result in my own "slow fade". These feelings are not meant to be a part of who we are, as Christians, even though anger has its place in any affair. But when I chose to look on my husband with eyes of compassion for his fall, it changed my way of thinking altogether. This man that I loved, was in a crisis, and by golly, I wanted to help him! If we all walked away from those who have fallen and are broken, then we are quitters. We are prideful. We are hard-hearted. We are missing the call of the gospel. 
     If you know someone who has fallen away from their faith, struggling against their flesh and the devil, and walking in ways contrary to scripture, can I ask you to show them compassion? Pity and feeling sorry for them isn't the same being compassionate. Pity involves pride, while compassion understands our own ability to fall-  choose compassion over pity! They are spiritually sick, and they need help. They need love. They need wise counsel. They need a hug. They desperately need prayer. They need the body of Christ more than ever before. Please don't neglect those who are floundering in their faith. What I realized is this-  I am capable of the same fall. My sincere hope is that should it ever happen, you will faithfully pursue my restoration. Your help may not be accepted for a long time, or possibly ever, but God has called us to live out the gospel. This doesn't only pertain to the lost, but also to those who have fallen away. God never turns His back on us when we fail or fall, and I pray I will live out that same principle in my own life, regarding others! See them with eyes like Jesus, and you'll start to see that they look an awful lot like you.

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, Colossians 3:12 ESV
"So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12 ESV
Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. 1 Peter 3:8 ESV
"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God. Matthew 5:9 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, may we train our eyes to see others with compassionate eyes, like Yours. It's so easy to dismiss those who have hurt us, refusing to restore relationships, and seeking revenge, instead. Help us to see the hurting, even though they have hurt us, too. God, help us to draw alongside the spiritually ill, and love them through it. In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen!

Never Say Never

     There are a few things I have proclaimed I would never do in life! One was marrying my husband;) My husband was my younger brother's BFF, so I never took him seriously when he said he liked me. I also never really thought I would be a fan of spray tans, but today, I sit here nice and golden (not orange), waiting to board a ship tomorrow. I mean, who likes to be pale when you're cruising the high seas? So I've learned something about the word "never" - a word I should use less often, and with careful consideration.
     Never was a word we used about infidelity. In our marriage, we believed it was a "never"- yet here we are, living in the  "it happened to us". I wonder if you've said it about your marriage, too. While it's an admirable goal, and one we hope to live up to, it's also a prideful statement. Anyone can fall, and I was taught that lesson in a painful way. I think a much better way to look at infidelity is to not say "never", but to carry out daily practices to protect you from a real possibility of falling to it. Because if you know my husband, you know, like me, that it really can happen to any of us. And while you may outwardly acknowledge the truth in that, you may inwardly whisper- but not for us. 
     What are your "nevers" in life? Looking back, how many did you actually end up doing at some point? For me, I have crossed plenty "nevers" off of my mental list. I've found that my "nevers" were rooted in pride, believing myself to be better than I truly am. But I've also found freedom in falling to them- freedom that when I do fall to my own ridiculous standards, God isn't surprised, and He is there for me, waiting for me to allow Him to carry me through. 
     If you feel as if you are safe from an extramarital affair, let go of that assumption. There isn't a need to feel fearful when you let go, but instead, look to God as the foundation in your marriage, and build it up day by day. Acknowledge your need of protection from sin, and arm yourselves daily in staying committed, and faithful. And please, never say never when it comes to infidelity. Instead, pray that God protects your marriage, and that you remember Who should be guiding each of you every day! You are never safer than when He is at the center of your marriage- so don't let Him go!

But I am afraid that as the serpent deceived Eve by his cunning, your thoughts will be led astray from a sincere and pure devotion to Christ. 2 Corinthians 11:3 ESV
Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall. 1 Corinthians 10:12 ESV
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9 ESV
Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, I confess my pride in believing I am above falling to sin. Help me  protect my marriage by allowing You to be at the center of it, and encouraging my spouse to allow that as well. Thank You for faithfully restoring and forgiving when we do fall. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!

Home in Body

     One of my favorite times of the day, was when my husband walked in from work, and everyone was home. Our day time separation was over, and my heart just felt lighter when he was with me. When he left, there was a huge hole in my life- no one to come in the door at the end of the day, and share my evening with. Yes, I had my kids, but it's a different connection with a spouse. I missed him, and I missed the way things had been years before. 
     When we had our initial reconciliation, I felt excited. Someone would come home to me again, and someone would share life by my side. I would get a phone call around 5:00, and have a dinner companion by 6:00. Things felt good, but we weren't where I really wanted to be. We reconciled because it was the "right thing to do," and sometimes, that just isn't enough. What was missing was a firm foundation in Christ, and allowing Him to make us new. 
     And so we made a go of it, on our terms. He felt better by doing what was right, and I felt hopeful that in time, God would reach his heart. I prayed God would use me to draw him closer to Jesus, and made an initial effort in making this work. But as the days passed, it was obvious that without Him at the center of our marriage, it would not be the better marriage we had hoped for. And after only a short 6 weeks time, I already noticed a shift in his devotion to me.
     I knew it was happening again. The signs were all there. His phone became unavailable to my sight, and he withdrew. I would see him texting someone in a way where he would hide his phone from view, or he would lean back to text. His phone calls to me became short, so he had the rest of the commute home to talk to the one he really desired. He stopped texting me throughout his work day, and when I sent him messages, I would get one word answers. He avoided being home, and worked as much as possible to stay away from me. He became sarcastic and uncaring. And I realized that while I had my husband home in body, his spirit was elsewhere.
     Have you felt this? Living together, but worlds apart? Goodness, it stinks! And in those times, it is much more comfortable to not have them home, than to have them home against their wishes. I felt like a burden. I felt twice rejected, and unwanted. I felt resigned to a life without him, and was beginning to think that was our destiny. I chastised myself for allowing him to come back home as a man I wasn't satisfied with- a man living apart from God. I had never walked this journey, and felt having him home was better than having him somewhere else. But if God isn't at the center of it, it isn't time. What a painful lesson that was to learn.
     My story made me think of God. While He always knows my motives for returning to Him, He never turns me away. If I run, He pursues. I often return with a heart lacking enthusiasm, and yet He welcomes me, regardless of my heart. But He won't stop with me there- He will continue with me, until He not only captures my attention, but captures my heart. Oh God, forgive me for my wayward heart; a heart that has hurt You with my selfishness. Give me a heart devoted to Your ways, and Your Son! Help me to see myself through my husband's rejection, and return to You with abandon. Help me to serve You, not out of duty, but out of heart spilling over with love. And when I do, I will see my husband with Your eyes- lost, and in need of Your pursuit. 

Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! Psalm 139:7-8 ESV
You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. Deuteronomy 6:5 ESV
This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone. Acts 4:11 ESV
And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. Matthew 7:25 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, help me to keep You at the center of my marriage, and all relationships. When anything else is substituted, I fail and struggle. Help me to see my own condition before You, when I see my wayward spouse. May my heart be turned to You, not by obligation, but by absolute devotion. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!