If it Didn't Happen for You

     My broken marriage was restored earlier this year, and I can tell you this- it wasn't my doing. I've had people ask me what I did, that would maybe help their own situation. I can't say why it happened for me, or that I am more qualified to receive this amazing gift than any other person. Frankly speaking, it wasn't owed to me just because I prayed for it, even though I longed for it in the depths of my soul. Because the bottom line is this- I can want something all day long, but if God isn't in it, and if hearts aren't changed on both sides, it likely won't happen.

     In my case, I wanted restoration. I prayed for it almost without ceasing. I was willing to work for it, and make necessary sacrifices. I was willing to go to marriage counseling and work through the tough issues that drove us apart. I could wish and work for it all day long, but if my husband had not opened his own heart to the calling and convicting of God, it wouldn't have happened for us. 

     We are only responsible for our own choices, and sometimes that truth can unsettle us. Had my husband chosen to ignore God's voice, we would probably be in the middle of a painful divorce. What choices are your loved ones making that you'd love to influence, or change? You may wish for a child to find victory over a drug addiction. You may wish for your spouse to stop being physically abusive. You may wish you could say just the right thing to lead your brother away from a life of alcoholism. Your son may be battling pornography, and you feel helpless. Your spouse may be lying in the arms of another man, leaving you heartbroken and lonely. These are choices that are being played out right before our eyes, causing deep pain and despair. And yet they are their choices- outside of our own control. We can plead, wish, and pray; but we can't make their choices for them. 

     I have spoken to some dear friends who have waited decades for their wayward spouses. My heart hurts for them. They wish for reconciliation too, but they are only one half of the broken marriage. We can pray for God to work in the lives and hearts of our estranged spouse, hopefully bringing them back, but they must open their own heart to His voice. Nothing I did on my own is responsible for my restoration story. I don't have any hidden secrets I could share that would make you say, "Ahh.. that's what it is!" I don't hold the key to success for a restored marriage. I honestly don't deserve the grace and mercy God has poured into my life and marriage, and yet that didn't stop Him. All I can tell you is this- God did it! He worked a miracle for us, and He can work one in your situation as well. Your child, your husband, your wife, your brother, your mom, your best friend- all can be reached by Him. No one is too far from His reach, no matter how bad it looks today! 

     If you're still waiting, know that He knows how hard the waiting is, and He cares so much about your situation. If you gave up, His heart hurt along with yours. You are only responsible for the choices you make- and sometimes the ones we love the most will make bad choices that will change the course of our lives forever. You are not responsible for their unwillingness to listen to God's voice. But you are responsible for your own choices- are you choosing well? My own marriage wasn't restored because I'm special, or God loves me more. It simply happened because both of us listened to what God had to say about it, and because of this, He is mending what our sin broke- because that's what God does!

Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit. Psalm 51:12 ESV
Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. Mark 11:24 ESV
"Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. John 14:1 ESV
"Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me? Jeremiah 32:27 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for the gift of restoration. I pray that others who are not given this opportunity, and are hurting today, will feel Your comfort and peace. Heal broken hearts, Lord, and turn back the ears of those who have wandered far from Your voice. In the name of Jesus, I pray, Amen!