Comfortable Me

 It had been a long day full of working in the yard in the North Carolina heat. Our heat is heat you swim around in—thick, humid and dehydrating. My body finds extremes harder and harder as it ages and a whole day on my feet against the elements quickly saps my energy. But all along I kept pushing myself while I mentally reminded myself that at the end of it all, there would be rest and comfort.

Shedding my sweaty, dirty clothes, I stepped into a cool shower; washing away heat, dirt and weariness. Even just this simple process of getting clean began reviving my spirit. My favorite lounge clothes, a soft blanket on my couch, and a cold drink made me sigh with relief. This was what I had pictured all along, waiting for me at the end of the day. It's what pushed me through when I felt like quitting and putting off the work for another day.

Comfort has been a topic that has been popping up in my life lately. I've had devotionals focus on it and a sermon about it this past Sunday. It's made me pay attention to the topic and give it some extra thought. Comfort is something my body and spirit crave, yet when I think of Jesus' life here, He had very little of it. Jesus was often weary as people clamored for His attention and rest was not in abundance for Him. As far as personal comforts, we know He had little of that as well, knowing the work His Father sent Him to do was the focus of His life and ministry.

We never read that Jesus was grumpy and rude because He was not comfortable. He didn't act poorly because He was too hot, too hungry, or tired. But I do. I have a strong desire for comfort and when I lack it, I often become upset and cranky. I think one of the biggest reasons for this is because I'm selfish in nature—I feel entitled to feel comfortable and when I don't, I get irritable.

Comfort isn't wrong, it's just that my thoughts about it often get turned around a little. God doesn't dislike the fact that I appreciate my bed, a warm shower and a good meal—but I'm not actually entitled to those things; they are a blessing given to me from His gracious hand. My thoughts of comfort should instead be "others oriented". That means that my motivation for comfort should shift from myself, to the comfort of people around me.

I think of the many times people have ministered to my need for comfort when I've been upset or sad. They have sat with me, prayed with me, and brought things to me that would offer care and love. There is nothing like the hug from a loved one when we are faced with something emotionally challenging. A warm meal dropped off from a caring friend offers comfort that is hard to match. These are ways we can comfort others and in doing so, be more like Jesus.

The Holy Spirit has many names—one being Comforter. I cannot even begin to name the ways He has proven this to be true in my own life. His Word is full of comfort and encouragement and I've leaned heavily on Scripture to receive His comfort. Being able to pray to the Father gives us a great source of comfort and relief. The simple act of laying our burdens at His feet means laying aside troublesome thoughts and resting in His ability to handle them all for us.

While I'll forever be a gal here that longs for a soft blanket, a comfy spot to rest a while, and a warm fire on a cold night, I hope my thoughts of comfort shift. I hope that I'll realize how important it is to seek the comfort of others above my own. May I be a source of comfort to those around me that have real needs and desire someone to draw alongside and just offer them love and care–even if it costs me my own personal comfort to do so. If I stay in my place of comfort, I'll not be used in the capacity that God longs to use me. I must throw aside that soft blanket and cup of coffee and really see what's going on around me. Only when I put aside my own comforts will I be able to actively pursue meeting the needs of others. May God help me to be less selfish and more of a servant.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God (2 Corinthians 1:3-4, ESV).

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18, ESV).

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3, ESV).

Dear Heavenly Father, help me shift my focus for personal comfort to meeting the needs of those who need comfort from me. Help me to follow Your example and offer love and encouragement to those who need it most. In Your name I pray, Amen!

Social Withdrawal

     For as far back as I can remember, I have been a very social person. I love get togethers, talking with friends and family, coffee with a friend, or going somewhere with a group of people. Being alone has its place, but I like it in small doses (and in broad daylight;). I have never been accused of being a loner or recluse, but when our marriage faced infidelity and my husband left, I changed.
     I don't know if it's "normal" or considered customary in cases of separation and infidelity, but I know that for me, I socially withdrew. I had no clue what to say to people, and I didn't want to face their questions or pity. Somedays I handled it better than others, but other days I wanted to lock myself in my room for the entire day. Initially, I would sit on my couch for hours and wonder how this happened. I would read my Bible for hours on end and journaled verses that I found especially helpful. On my couch, I felt safer, and my family teased me about getting up, and out. 
     If you have been betrayed by your spouse, and were separated, you may know what I experienced. It was completely out of character for me, yet it was my unique way of trying to deal with a situation I never imagined would be mine. In many ways, it was an avoidance of enjoying life and moving forward. I felt so sad and heartbroken that I had little interest in doing things that used to bring me joy. Such a big part of who I had been for the past 25 years was wrapped up in my husband, and who we were together. Learning to be separate from "us" was difficult, and it was hard for me to find my way.
     While I avoided family functions, conversations with mutual friends in the grocery store, and other social situations, I found immense comfort in drawing close to the Lord. I felt Him with me, and I craved His soothing presence. Even though I felt alone in many ways, I was vividly aware of how He was present with me. It wasn't that I didn't have people that sat on my couch with me, because I did. My sister, daughter, and niece or nephew spent many hours of many days and evenings on it with me. But moving out of my safety zone was difficult for the first 6 months or so. Eventually, with the encouragement of others, and prodding from the Spirit, I was able to slowly come out of my social withdrawal, and begin the process of finding who I was, without him. The more I came out amongst others, the more I saw how many of us there were. And God began opening my heart to see my situation as a ministry of sorts. If you have been called to walk a difficult road in your life, look around you. There are those who are hurting, and need encouragement, a listening ear, and a friend. Our ministry as christians, is to reach out to those around us with a need. We have been given a unique opportunity to use our journey through a situation, as a way to show others the hope found in our Heavenly Father. And each of you that needed me, well- I thank you for helping me along my own path to healing, and restoring my "social butterfly" status!  

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15 ESV
But I do not account my life of any value nor as precious to myself, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God. Acts 20:24 ESV
And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?" Then I said, "Here am I! Send me." Isaiah 6:8 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for helping me overcome social withdrawal. I thank You as well for sending those who encouraged me in my darkest times. I pray that You will give me a heart of compassion for those who have walked my journey, and offer them the hope I found in You. Help me to see the needs of others who are searching for answers, and may I always direct them to You. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!