The older I get, the more opportunities I've witnessed where I felt led to speak up, and speak out. Whether it's been a boy-crazy young girl, a flirtatious married woman, an inappropriate relationship, harsh treatment of another, or spiritual bullying, I feel something needs to be said. And to be quite frank, sometimes "that person" doing something inappropriate has been me. I've sat on both sides of this fence, and neither is a pleasant place to be. However, as Christians, we have a responsibility to uphold our spiritual testimony and represent Him well. But before I am in a place to speak out, I must first look deep within my own heart before I can justify the calling to approach another. While there are many things that may qualify or disqualify me, I'd like to look at just four.
Before it should be me, I'll need to first check myself. Am I in a spiritual position to speak up, or do I have my own issues to resolve first? Will I speak to someone about lust, and have a problem with overspending (revealing my own lust for "things")? While we all have our own personal wrestlings, we don't want to point out others without first addressing our own. If you feel led to approach another, pray for wisdom in your words, timing, and to reveal any hidden issues of your own heart.
The second area for qualifying you to speak up is in relationship. Before it should be my responsibility, I should first have a solid, loving, personal, connected relationship with this person. My words will never be taken to heart unless they first felt wholly loved by me. This means that we have one-on-one dialogue- learning and sharing life issues and triumphs with one another. This person would call me "friend" and not just a fellow believer. If the relationship is there, my words will not be heard as harsh judgment, but as loving instruction and advice to be considered.
No one will ever respond well to correctional words spoken without love. You should be known as one who loves them, and your words should come forth in a spirit of love. This means there is no trace of anger or malice in your tone or your motives- your words and intentions are purely coming from a heart of love. Why do kids generally respond well to a parents correction? Because they understand that correction is generated from a heart of love and concern. So if you don't have a mutually loving relationship with this person- you aren't the best one to speak up.
Last- use scripture. If you feel they need rescued, make sure it's based on what God has to say, and not your own opinions. When there is an obvious battle between a person's behavior, and God's Word, it should be easy to point out. In the face of scripture, the initial response to retaliate may vanish in light of Who gives us our model for spiritual behavior. Find a few clear, concise scriptures that identify the root of what you're observing that led you to approach them. Do not skip the first three, and only use this qualification, or it won't be well received.
I'll be the first to admit that it stinks to be approached by even a qualified person, and how often the first response I feel is to defend myself. I may list a number of reasons to try to excuse my behavior- that's my spirit of pride. And it also stinks to be the person who is qualified that has to speak out- it's a very difficult thing to do, and yet it's going to be necessary at times. If you see a sister or brother whom you feel needs addressed, please make sure you fit the qualifications to do so. Being a leader in title only will not qualify you. Please only approach someone if you can put a check mark beside the above qualifications. Sometimes- things have to be said. And sometimes- you won't be the best one to speak up. God, give us wisdom to know when it should fall on us, and please grant us grace when we are the recipients of correction.
Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Galatians 6:1 (ESV)
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (ESV)
Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life, but he who rejects reproof leads others astray. Proverbs 10:17 (ESV)
Dear Heavenly Father, please open our eyes and our hearts to the spiritual needs of others. But Lord, help us to see our own shortcomings before we speak out. Help us to speak out of love and relationship, and not title and selfish motives. Give us courage when we are the one qualified to speak, and help others to hear us and know our words come from You. In Jesus name we pray, Amen!
Silence. Do you get enough of it? I don't. The world is a really noisy place, and often I wish to just get away and enjoy some peace and quiet. I love the Christmas song Silent Night. The tune is breathtakingly beautiful- especially when sung by one of my favorite artists. But the words silent and calm rarely are a reality for me. And if you're like me, I'm sure you can relate.
I like to have fun. I like to be surrounded by people and talking and laughter. Nothing is wrong with that, but too much of it drowns out something I desperately need to hear- God's voice. We are a people full of our own problems- marriage problems, problems with our kids, problems with our jobs, problems with our health and financial problems. We want God to help us and often pray for His leading and guidance, then we surround ourselves with so much noise that we will never hear His answers. This is the first misstep toward finding real peace in our troubled situations. By avoiding silence, we inadvertently avoid His whispered words of wisdom and direction.
Christmas is my favorite time of year- there is no season that compares to all that Christmas offers us. It's a time of fellowship, family, food and festivities. It's shopping and baking and wrapping and decorating. It's rich in tradition, and warms even the coldest of heart. But here is another thing it is: busy! So how can we balance our holiday agenda while making sure we are listening to the One whom we are celebrating?
I've got quite an extensive prayer list right now. I have friends who are really sick. I have family members who are struggling. I have relatives that still need salvation. I'm praying for couples that are either in a battle for their marriage, or recovering from one (just like us). Our home is often faced with decisions that demand answers- some easier than others. I can pray, and pray, and pray, but if I'm not listening, then what's the point? I desperately need God- and I desperately long for clarity. I want to see my prayers answered, and I want to hear His voice as it leads me in the very best direction.
God won't force His way into our lives- He lets us choose. My choices hold a lot of eternal weight. Will I allow time for listening, or will I cram one more noisy activity into my day, ultimately crowding Him out? Sweet friends, Jesus is always listening. He craves interaction with us. I often don't understand how privileged I am to enjoy a two-way relationship with the God of the Universe. And so I encourage you, this busy, noisy Christmas season, to make time for a silent night. Listen for His voice- because missing it is such a loss. Missing it means we misstep, leading us down a path He never intended. I'm guilty of over-extending, and I need to be the first to own up to falling short of active listening- but I want to do better. I need to do better. And so I'm making myself a promise- a promise to allow more silence into this season, so I'll hear Him... really hear Him, when He speaks to me.
My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God. Proverbs 2:1-5 (ESV)
Make me to know your ways, O LORD; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long. Psalm 25:4-5 (ESV)
Dear Heavenly Father, I long for silence, amidst the noise of life. I need it, because without it, I'll never hear You. Help me to keep my heart and my ears open to Your Word and Your voice. May I take time this Christmas season for a little bit of silence- active silence that begs answers to my prayers. And in this silence, may my heart worship and praise You! In Your name, I pray Jesus, Amen!
