The Pull

 This week I was struck with how easily our flesh is drawn to the temporary pleasures the world has to offer. I felt sick and tired of the pull—the constant lure toward sin. How often I exchange a few moments of fun for something of real value. Something that could have a positive impact on my eternal reward. In almost 40 years of following Christ, I've never yet outgrown the desire for earthly pleasures and the lust of the flesh, and I suspect that won't change until I leave here, taking my final breath when I'll finally be set free.

But I'm not there yet, so I pray that God will touch my heart for His Presence and that I'll stop short-selling Jesus for lesser things. Somedays, I feel disgusted with my wasted days and months and seasons. I wish every moment had been in surrender to His will for me. But in reality, when compared to the length of time I've spent here, the moments of surrender have been few. I feel sin-sick and too often drawn to the things I shouldn't be drawn to.

I've been enjoying a new Gaither Vocal Band song this week titled 'Out of Bondage'. Here are a few lines from the song:

Out of bondage, into freedom

From the chains that held me fast,

Out of bondage, into freedom

From my prison free at last.

While this song is written about our freedom from our past and the sin that stood between us and God, I love to think of this in another way: the day my heart will forever be free from the pull toward this world and its shallow offerings. The day my chains will be forever loosed from my body—set free in my eternal home.

It's not that I don't love my life, and appreciate the blessings God has given me in so many areas. I love my husband and kids and family and friends. I love my church family, my dogs and my home. It's not that I long for death. But friends, some days I just feel weary of the brokenness here. The pain of wrong choices. The corruption of leaders. The indulgence in sin. The perversion of sex. The profane and idle chatter. The jealousy. The betrayal and lies. It's all so ugly and so heavy, and yet God stands with His arms wide open, beckoning me to fall into them and find peace and joy I could never find here. 

And so I run to Him, asking Him to forgive me—forgive us for this filth in our hearts. I hurt for Him as He looks on and sees it all—every single sin that cost Him His precious, only Son. And I wonder how we so easily forget. How can we be so callous? Why are we so drawn to things that hurt our Savior? I want to hunger for Him above all other persons or things. But I'll feel this away again more times than I care to admit. I'll feel pulled away from Him for something temporary. Something shallow. I'll waste more days and more opportunity. But today, I don't want to. I want my life to be spiritually rich and abundantly valuable in His eyes. 

"God, touch our hearts for You. May we hunger for You each day, weighing up our choices for where we pour our hearts. Help us to remember the tremendous cost of our sin, and may we truly have a desire to live a surrendered life. Forgive us for our constant desire for worldly offerings. And until the day I'm finally set free from the pull, hold me fast in Your loving arms."

Training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age (Titus 2:12, ESV),

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh (Galatians 5:16, ESV).

Thanksgiving isn't About Turkey and Pie

     I'm getting really excited. Thanksgiving ushers in my favorite time of year- it's full of food, family, Christmas music, football, Black Friday planning, and more food. It is the opening of the whole Christmas season, complete with most of my favorite things. Thanksgiving, in my opinion, is the best holiday, because of what follows. I'm one of those people that have all trees in place to celebrate Thanksgiving- it's a mood all in itself.
     But Thanksgiving really isn't about all those things. It's not about turkey and pumpkin pie. It's not even about family. While those things bring plenty of gratefulness from my heart, they aren't the basis for the holiday. Thanksgiving is about being thankful- a season of reflection, appreciation and gratitude to the One who has blessed us with each gift we've been given. And often, if I'm being completely honest, I celebrate the season and get caught up in tradition, rather than the Giver of good things.
     Forgetting to really show thankfulness isn't a new problem, although it seems to be getting more rampant as years pass by. This brings to mind the story of the ten lepers Jesus healed in Luke 17. Ten healed, yet only one came to thank Jesus for healing him. Nine of them walked away celebrating their healing without thanking, or even caring to know their Healer. But one did. Man, I want to be like that one leper. I don't want my life to be like the nine that knew no real sense of gratitude. Their life had been doomed, and with their healing, their life sentence removed. You think to yourself, how rude and ungrateful- yet often I am sadly no better. 
     The season is upon us as Thanksgiving draws closer, yet we don't need a special day to live a life of gratitude. We are so blessed no matter what our situation is. God has given us life, yes, but if we know Him as Savior, He has given us the hope of what really matters. Life won't always be easy- in fact, most often it isn't. If you're like me, you've had your share of heartache and hard times, but it's so great thing to remember it's all temporary. If we could truly get a glimpse of our eternal home, our life would be completely transformed. We wouldn't be so focused on staying here. We wouldn't be so earthly minded. We have just a short span of living in a world tainted with hurt and brokenness. The best is yet to come for those of us who belong to Him. This helps us to better live in a spirit of thankfulness despite our circumstances. 
     Our God is a good God, but our God also loves to hear our words of thanksgiving. When we give good things to others, we expect to hear words of thanks- if we don't, we are hurt, disappointed and feel taken for granted. Why do we treat God differently, forgetting to thank Him for our many blessings and for what He has done for us? At this time of Thanksgiving, I want to encourage and challenge each of you to speak words of gratitude. Tell your family words of thanks. Tell your spouse how much you appreciate them. Tell your friends how grateful you are for them. But don't forget the Giver of all these blessings, and how much we owe Him. Because in the multitude of a debt I can never re-pay, I can say "thank You." 

Oh give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever! Psalm 107:1 ESV
I will give to the LORD the thanks due to his righteousness, and I will sing praise to the name of the LORD, the Most High. Psalm 7:17 ESV
Giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, Ephesians 5:20 ESV
Offer to God a sacrifice of thanksgiving, ... Psalm 50:14a ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, there is so much we should thank You for- for Your life, Your great sacrifice on the cross, for providing a way of salvation. Lord, we are thankful for Your love, for Your physical provisions for us. And Father, for the blessing of loved ones and family, we thank You. Help us to live a lifestyle of gratitude- that we would show it always and not just in this season of Thanksgiving. In Your name we pray, Lord Jesus, Amen!

Learning to be Content

     If there is anything our modern world struggles with, it's learning to be content with what we have. We always want more. We want better. We want something we don't have. A small dose of this means we have goals to achieve something greater than we are currently experiencing. But if we are unappreciative of what we have in this moment, we are missing the mark. The Apostle Paul made a remarkable statement, considering his circumstances. This is the statement he made: "Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content." (Philippians 4:11 ESV). 
     Paul wrote this statement during a very difficult time for him. He had been in prison for two years in Rome. He wasn't treated well, nor was he being held there for acts that would actually be considered "criminal". He had been beaten and mistreated. In our flesh, we see this as reason to be unhappy and angry. Paul learned something we should really try to learn ourselves- joy isn't circumstantial when you have Christ. Paul didn't consider this world to be "home", but rather a place of opportunity for building up the kingdom of Christ. 
     Life can bring about some pretty frustrating and heartbreaking situations. Our work can leave us feeling unappreciated and stressed. Our relationships can bring about pain and sadness. Our marriages can break our hearts. We may struggle to pay bills. We may want more than what we have. And while these are legitimate feelings we face, they shouldn't steal our contentment in Christ. We don't want to be entitled Christians. God doesn't owe us anything- certainly not material comfort. Jesus didn't have material comfort while He lived here, so we shouldn't feel like we are owed that from Him. 
     When it comes to infidelity, it is clear that discontentment led to the decision to betray a spouse. Often, it's not even discontentment with a spouse, but with ourselves. We become unhappy with our current state and want something better. The answers in looking for "better" will never be found outside of His best for us- and that won't ever include infidelity. If you're sitting inside of a marriage that doesn't thrill you, apart from abuse, look inside of yourself. Will making some personal changes for the better lead you to a healthier marriage? Being "content" doesn't mean that when we are living outside of His purposes for us, we don't make some changes. It doesn't mean that we don't try to improve our situations. But what it does mean is to appreciate the good in your current situation, seeing the blessings God has given you in this moment. 
     If you are stuck in a situation that is sapping your joy, Paul would ask you to consider what is ahead for you. We can get so focused on the here and now, and forget about our eternal destination- our forever home. Did I feel joy when my marriage was a mess? To be honest with you, I struggled with this same truth from Paul for quite some time. But I learned that I had to trust that God would turn the "bad" of my present, into "good" in the future. I had to come to grips with the fact that my joy couldn't be stolen by circumstances if it's firmly rooted in Christ and all that He offers. People can't make me content. A job can't make me content. A home and material goods can't offer contentment. Contentment is only found in Jesus Christ- He gives us so much more than the fleeting comforts this world offers. I want to be like Paul, and be happy and content in this place of of my life, enjoying the good things God has chosen to bless me with, and not focusing on what I'm missing out on.

Keep your life free from the love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." Hebrews 13:5 ESV
Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. 1 Timothy 6:6-8 ESV
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, forgive me for my selfish and greedy ways. My heart always wants more, and I forget to be content in this moment of my life. Help me to be truly thankful for the things You've blessed me with, and to never feel unthankful when I want more than You've given me. Help me to live with the attitude of the Apostle Paul, understanding that true contentment can only be found in You. In Jesus's name I pray, Amen!
     

Counting my Blessings

     When life borders on the miserable side, it's helpful to back up, and make a mental note of what I am grateful for. As a human, I tend to dwell on the negative issues I am facing, and fail to appreciate the positives. As Christians, we are encouraged to embrace our trials, recognizing their ability to draw us closer to Christ, but my flesh often gets in the way.
     My brain was saturated with my situation, and what the outcome would be. I worried about my husband, I struggled with insecurities, I feared the future, I wondered about finances, I felt for my children, and I wished for a different life journey. I felt anger at times, and frustration at other times. I longed for the second coming of Christ in a new way- a way to escape this mess. I cried often, I prayed fervently, I hoped and pleaded. This was my way of life for longer than I wished. Living in this state is not experiencing the joy the Lord offers us- a joy that is not dependent on our circumstances. 
     If you are walking in the more difficult areas of your life story, join me in looking for the many blessings we have, despite the heartache and pain. I have so many blessings, and I don't want to miss them, even amidst hard times. I don't want to live a life lacking thankfulness for the good things I am given, because I am too focused on the harder things. 
     When I step back, and look at my whole life picture, the painful parts of my story are much shorter than the joyful moments. Yes, the painful parts will forever change me, and I pray they change me for the better. I know that God will use those experiences to allow me opportunities to reach in and help others, that will walk similar roads. And honestly, that is also a blessing. 
     We will all feel heartaches and disappointments in life, from time to time. But if we can, in those moments, look to the One Who has blessed us in other areas, we can take a little breath and thank our Heavenly Father for the things we are able to enjoy. It doesn't make the pain go away, and it often doesn't change our circumstances- but it can change our perspective! I want a perspective that focuses on the good things He has given me, and the promises He has made. I can remind myself of the truth found in Jeremiah 29:11- He has GOOD plans for me! 

Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, Psalm 103:2 ESV
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 ESV
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, Ephesians 1:3 ESV
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 ESV

Dear Heavenly Father, when my days are hard and painful, help me to look for the good You have given me. Focusing on the heartache and pain is exhausting and steals my energy and joy. Help me literally count my blessings, and remember to thank You for them. You have been so good to me, and I am thankful. Give me a grateful heart, In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!