Life is like school. We may think we know most of what we need to know by the time we graduate college, but in reality, I knew little of what I needed to know at that point in life. Life is full of lessons- some are good and some are hard. But if we walk it, we need to get something out of it. If we don't, it was a wasted experience, and other experiences will follow until we get the point.
When bad things happen, we can get stuck in the cycle of asking "why". We won't always know why, and we might not understand the answer even if we did. "Why" makes me anxious and uptight, and even a little angry. Why did this happen? Why did it happen to me? Why was I allowed to experience this heartache? Why did he do it? Focusing on "why" isn't going to help me make progress. Friends, sometimes we don't get our answer, and even if we did, it won't change what happened.
When bad things do happen to us, and they will, we can look for what we have learned through the trial. If I have to experience a heartbreaking issue in my life, I want to learn from it. If I don't, shame on me. I don't want to learn cynicism from it, because that wouldn't be what God meant for me to learn. I don't want to learn bitterness from it, because that won't bring me to healing. I want to find the good things I learned as I walked that painful road, and use them to change me for the better.
Infidelity changed me. I don't take life for granted, and I don't take my marriage for granted. I appreciate the grace of God in a new way. I understand my own shortcomings I had failed to see before. I no longer underestimate the viciousness of Satan's attacks. I realize the importance of staying intimately connected to my Heavenly Father. My eyes were opened to the serious consequences of bad choices, made by parents, in the life of our children. I am humbled at the working of the Holy Spirit to restore and make new. I am overwhelmed with the comfort offered by Jesus in dark times. I am much more aware of our fallibility. And through His Spirit, I am stronger than I ever imagined.
Yes, life has many lessons. And when I am tested, I want to pass. And if I don't pass, I want an opportunity for test corrections. I want to learn good things from hard things. I want to grow through my trials, and not falter. I want to use my experiences to point others to Jesus. I want to be a light in a world full of darkness. And I want to keep learning, keep growing, and move past the "why", into something better- something that results in being more like my Savior.
Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, Philippians 3:13 ESV
Now these things happened to them as an example, but they were written down for our instruction, on whom the end of the ages has come. 1 Corinthians 10:11 ESV
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James 1:2-4 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, help me to learn good things from the bad experiences in life. Help keep me from bitterness and anger, and look for ways to use them to develop into someone more like You. May I use the trials I experience to grow and learn. And help me to remember how You carry me through them all. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Thursday, February 7, 2019
Wednesday, February 6, 2019
Rings
I will never forget the day my best friend became my fiance, and slipped an engagement ring on my finger. We were walking along the beach on Topsail Island, and he proposed to me. That ring was special to me, and so was the man that placed it on my hand. I couldn't wait to show everyone- so much so, that even though I had sun poisoning on my LIPS, and had pink scaly lotion on them, I just HAD to go to church to share my news. Seriously, I can't believe I did that, looking back!
Rings are special, especially to us women. And the story behind them is even more special. So when I decided to remove my wedding ring, it tore at my heart. My ring meant that I belonged to someone, and removing it meant that I didn't. Most people my age wore one, and I wondered how many, like me, took it for granted. When I first put mine on at the age of 22, I never really took it off. It was there, and after the initial newness of it wore off, I didn't really pay too much attention to it.
If you have faced infidelity, you may have your own "ring story". My husband removed his immediately- and seeing his hand without it, made me feel sick to my stomach. Initially, I kept mine on for a month or two, unable to part with the significance of the promises I had made. But slowly, I began to see that it was a symbol of what was, rather than what is. I would have given anything to not face the truth, but my marriage was simply broken, and until that changed, my ring would remain packed away.
It's hard to face promises that aren't kept. When we make a promise, we should keep it, and I especially felt this was true regarding a marriage union. But the bottom line is, we can only control our end of keeping promises- the responsibility of the promises made by our spouse rests on them. When I slipped off my wedding ring, it wasn't because I forgot the promises I made, it was because he did.
I am so thankful for a Heavenly Father that always keeps His promises! He will never let us down, and we can always count on Him to follow through on His Word. I thought of that often, as I looked at my empty ring finger. While my husband forgot what he vowed on that hot summer day in 1993, Jesus won't ever forget me. If you are brokenhearted because someone let you down in a big way, allow the comfort of a faithful Savior to soothe your pain. Remind yourself of the promises He has made to you, and that He has good plans for you- even though your heart hurts today. Oh, how He loves us!
It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. Ecclesiastes 5:5 ESV
God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it? Numbers 23:19 ESV
So that by two unchangeable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to hold fast to the hope set before us. Hebrews 6:18 ESV
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Hebrews 13:4 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, it hurts to have our hearts broken by empty promises; especially by our own spouse. Give me the help, courage, and strength for whatever is ahead, and give me wisdom to follow Your way for me. Open doors that should be open, and close doors that should be closed- and help me to honor whichever You choose for me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Rings are special, especially to us women. And the story behind them is even more special. So when I decided to remove my wedding ring, it tore at my heart. My ring meant that I belonged to someone, and removing it meant that I didn't. Most people my age wore one, and I wondered how many, like me, took it for granted. When I first put mine on at the age of 22, I never really took it off. It was there, and after the initial newness of it wore off, I didn't really pay too much attention to it.
If you have faced infidelity, you may have your own "ring story". My husband removed his immediately- and seeing his hand without it, made me feel sick to my stomach. Initially, I kept mine on for a month or two, unable to part with the significance of the promises I had made. But slowly, I began to see that it was a symbol of what was, rather than what is. I would have given anything to not face the truth, but my marriage was simply broken, and until that changed, my ring would remain packed away.
It's hard to face promises that aren't kept. When we make a promise, we should keep it, and I especially felt this was true regarding a marriage union. But the bottom line is, we can only control our end of keeping promises- the responsibility of the promises made by our spouse rests on them. When I slipped off my wedding ring, it wasn't because I forgot the promises I made, it was because he did.
I am so thankful for a Heavenly Father that always keeps His promises! He will never let us down, and we can always count on Him to follow through on His Word. I thought of that often, as I looked at my empty ring finger. While my husband forgot what he vowed on that hot summer day in 1993, Jesus won't ever forget me. If you are brokenhearted because someone let you down in a big way, allow the comfort of a faithful Savior to soothe your pain. Remind yourself of the promises He has made to you, and that He has good plans for you- even though your heart hurts today. Oh, how He loves us!
It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. Ecclesiastes 5:5 ESV
God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it? Numbers 23:19 ESV
So that by two unchangeable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to hold fast to the hope set before us. Hebrews 6:18 ESV
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Hebrews 13:4 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, it hurts to have our hearts broken by empty promises; especially by our own spouse. Give me the help, courage, and strength for whatever is ahead, and give me wisdom to follow Your way for me. Open doors that should be open, and close doors that should be closed- and help me to honor whichever You choose for me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Tuesday, February 5, 2019
I Can't do This!
I am a slow learner, but man, I am learning. I think back on a "pre-mom me", and I hear myself saying that I couldn't handle losing a pregnancy- then I walked that journey not once, but twice! I see myself through the years telling my own husband and others I could never forgive an affair, and certainly couldn't deal with that, and what do you know? I think it's our feeble attempt at almost telling God, not me- that is too big for me to handle. And I think that's true, for the most part.
Life is going to have its share of trials and hard times. It can't really be any different when we live in a world touched by sin, and its consequences. I have wished to fast forward through those more difficult days and seasons, but then I would miss the lessons in them. When it comes to the bigger heartaches in life, we will struggle even more if we don't find a source of strength. The world places a lot of emphasis on physical strength, and while it has a benefit to us, it won't help us through those harder days. And since I go to the gym out of necessity over enjoyment, I'm pretty glad it isn't that kind of strength I will need in order to survive hardships.
I know people talk about how God won't give you more than you can handle, and I don't necessarily think that is true. Because when we are relying on Him to fight our battles, we will find that our strength doesn't really matter, but His does. I think a better way of putting it is like this - He won't give us more than He can handle. Because when it comes to the really hard stuff in life, like adultery, I am going to need strength much bigger than my own. In those moments, it won't be me that will carry myself through them, it will be my Heavenly Father!
I think the Apostle Paul got it. He talked about how in his weakness, he could be strong. When I allow myself to be weak, and just give it over to God to handle, I am the strongest I can be! So when people talk to me about my strength, it truly isn't mine you are seeing, it's His! There is so much comfort in knowing that no matter what life presents, I won't have to handle it alone. No matter how I may struggle against the difficult things, I need to remember that if I truly want to be victorious over them, I must let the Source of my strength handle it for me. And I'm learning something else, too -never say never!
I can do all things through him who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 ESV
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Ephesians 6:10 ESV
Be strong and courageous. Do not fear of be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6 ESV
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for the strength You give me. I am not able to do some of the harder things on my own. You challenge us to give up our own will, and allow You to transform us with Your strength and power. I thank You for that marvelous gift- which enables me to handle what I could not, apart from You. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Life is going to have its share of trials and hard times. It can't really be any different when we live in a world touched by sin, and its consequences. I have wished to fast forward through those more difficult days and seasons, but then I would miss the lessons in them. When it comes to the bigger heartaches in life, we will struggle even more if we don't find a source of strength. The world places a lot of emphasis on physical strength, and while it has a benefit to us, it won't help us through those harder days. And since I go to the gym out of necessity over enjoyment, I'm pretty glad it isn't that kind of strength I will need in order to survive hardships.
I know people talk about how God won't give you more than you can handle, and I don't necessarily think that is true. Because when we are relying on Him to fight our battles, we will find that our strength doesn't really matter, but His does. I think a better way of putting it is like this - He won't give us more than He can handle. Because when it comes to the really hard stuff in life, like adultery, I am going to need strength much bigger than my own. In those moments, it won't be me that will carry myself through them, it will be my Heavenly Father!
I think the Apostle Paul got it. He talked about how in his weakness, he could be strong. When I allow myself to be weak, and just give it over to God to handle, I am the strongest I can be! So when people talk to me about my strength, it truly isn't mine you are seeing, it's His! There is so much comfort in knowing that no matter what life presents, I won't have to handle it alone. No matter how I may struggle against the difficult things, I need to remember that if I truly want to be victorious over them, I must let the Source of my strength handle it for me. And I'm learning something else, too -never say never!
I can do all things through him who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 ESV
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Ephesians 6:10 ESV
Be strong and courageous. Do not fear of be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6 ESV
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for the strength You give me. I am not able to do some of the harder things on my own. You challenge us to give up our own will, and allow You to transform us with Your strength and power. I thank You for that marvelous gift- which enables me to handle what I could not, apart from You. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Monday, February 4, 2019
His Story- Buried in Lies
Have you ever found yourself caught in a lie? We have to all be honest here- we all lie. It's not okay, and it's doesn't make it excusable, but we are all guilty. It's an uncomfortable moment, to know you are caught, and yet we seldom just raise our hand, and say- I'm sorry, I lied. Instead, we usually tell another one to try to get out of the first. It's an ugly cycle, for sure. When it comes to infidelity, everything is pretty much a lie.
An affair is not based on truth. We tell lies, or lies of omission, to cover up the truth. The simple act of slipping off a wedding ring to deceive, is a lie. Leaving out details of my marriage and family, is dishonest. Telling my wife lies to hide my actions became second nature. It was an ugly and exhausting place to live- a world of disillusionment. This was not what I had been saved for- rather it had been what I was saved from! And here I was, shrugging back into the cloak of sin and evil.
I have always been known by others for my integrity and honesty, and for the truth of who I had become to be uncovered, made me very uncomfortable, and shattered my image and self-esteem. The truth is this- lies are humbling. I had lived too long in a place of pride and dishonesty, and living a double life would eventually bring me to the bottom.
It's hard to lose respect of those who loved me the most, and yet it was because of my own actions. There wasn't a time I was comfortable with my actions or the lies I was telling, and yet I continued to do it out of selfishness. It took a long time for me to see what was driving me to this out-of-character behavior, but the bottom line was simply a selfishness that had no place in the life of a believer.
You may struggle with lies as well, and find it hard to keep track of what you have said. Lies hurt those that love us, but they also hurt our Heavenly Father. Lies need to be confessed in order to be forgiven. If you are the one deceiving, own up to it and allow God to help make things right. If you have been hurt by the lies of your spouse, I pray you will get the apology you so deserve. But if you don't, you can still find freedom in forgiving them without ever receiving an apology. You can't ever make a marriage reconcile this way, but if reconciliation isn't possible, freedom always is. I am so grateful for the grace of God, for without it, I would be lost forever. His grace makes all things possible, and the grace shown to me by my wife was a gift I couldn't understand, apart from her knowing the heart of our Savior. I am thankful to share my journey with you, and pray that through my sin and betrayal, I can point you to the only One that can erase it all, and give hope and life through His Son!
Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who act faithfully are his delight. Proverbs 12:22 ESV
Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Colossians 3:9-10 ESV
For nothing is hidden that will not be made manifest, nor is anything secret that will not be known and come to light. Luke 8:17 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, help me to live in truth, and to let my words be acceptable in Your sight. Forgive me for lies, deceit, and selfishness. Help to restore my relationships, and to be a man after Your heart. I thank You for grace, and second chances. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
An affair is not based on truth. We tell lies, or lies of omission, to cover up the truth. The simple act of slipping off a wedding ring to deceive, is a lie. Leaving out details of my marriage and family, is dishonest. Telling my wife lies to hide my actions became second nature. It was an ugly and exhausting place to live- a world of disillusionment. This was not what I had been saved for- rather it had been what I was saved from! And here I was, shrugging back into the cloak of sin and evil.
I have always been known by others for my integrity and honesty, and for the truth of who I had become to be uncovered, made me very uncomfortable, and shattered my image and self-esteem. The truth is this- lies are humbling. I had lived too long in a place of pride and dishonesty, and living a double life would eventually bring me to the bottom.
It's hard to lose respect of those who loved me the most, and yet it was because of my own actions. There wasn't a time I was comfortable with my actions or the lies I was telling, and yet I continued to do it out of selfishness. It took a long time for me to see what was driving me to this out-of-character behavior, but the bottom line was simply a selfishness that had no place in the life of a believer.
You may struggle with lies as well, and find it hard to keep track of what you have said. Lies hurt those that love us, but they also hurt our Heavenly Father. Lies need to be confessed in order to be forgiven. If you are the one deceiving, own up to it and allow God to help make things right. If you have been hurt by the lies of your spouse, I pray you will get the apology you so deserve. But if you don't, you can still find freedom in forgiving them without ever receiving an apology. You can't ever make a marriage reconcile this way, but if reconciliation isn't possible, freedom always is. I am so grateful for the grace of God, for without it, I would be lost forever. His grace makes all things possible, and the grace shown to me by my wife was a gift I couldn't understand, apart from her knowing the heart of our Savior. I am thankful to share my journey with you, and pray that through my sin and betrayal, I can point you to the only One that can erase it all, and give hope and life through His Son!
Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who act faithfully are his delight. Proverbs 12:22 ESV
Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Colossians 3:9-10 ESV
For nothing is hidden that will not be made manifest, nor is anything secret that will not be known and come to light. Luke 8:17 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, help me to live in truth, and to let my words be acceptable in Your sight. Forgive me for lies, deceit, and selfishness. Help to restore my relationships, and to be a man after Your heart. I thank You for grace, and second chances. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Sunday, February 3, 2019
Asking for Help
If you are having marital difficulties strong enough to question your durability and commitment, it's probably time for counseling. If you are seriously unhappy with your spouse, it's time for counseling. If you can't seem to understand one another, and it's causing an issue, it's time for counseling. If you have one partner that has been sexually unfaithful, it's definitely time for counseling.
While there are a myriad of issues that can benefit from counseling, I can say personally that a counselor is invaluable in helping sort out the mess in your mind, when it comes to adultery. I found it causes anxiety to keep things in, and it released tension to talk things through. I am so thankful for the availability of counseling, and the choices I had open to me.
I lived an entire 47 years before I ever darkened the door of a counseling center. I am fortunate to have not felt it necessary in my past, but when I was faced with infidelity, I needed an outlet for my thoughts and feelings. While I had many friends and family I was able to talk to about my situation, at least to a degree, they were all connected to one side or the other. I loved having a safe person to share my thoughts with who was completely outside of the situation. This person had the necessary training to make sense of the issues I was dealing with, and offer ways to cope in a positive way.
Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Many people feel that they should be able to deal with life's struggles on their own, but many times, we just can't do it well. When we try to handle big things on our own, we often don't heal in a healthy way. Not only did I find a listening ear in my counselor, I found an invaluable friend. While I went for close to a year by myself, I am thankful to have sessions now with both of us present. A counselor is so helpful in opening up our eyes and hearts to the needs and feelings of our spouse.
You may have grown up hearing that counseling is a waste of time, or that you can fix any problem on your own. I want to encourage you to remove any old thought patterns you may have heard against it, and look into a good christian counselor. Once you go and connect with one, you will soon see the rewards for having someone professional and safe, giving guidance and encouragement.
Having a christian counselor that supports the truths found in scripture is important. Not only did I find one of that fit that description, but I also received wonderful advice and help from others. None will be able to shed as much light as someone that has walked the journey of infidelity. And of course I had my Heavenly Father, always with me, and listening to my thoughts and my heart. Speak to Him- share your feelings, and know that He is completely invested in you. When we open our hearts to those willing to help, we will be on the road to healing, much faster!
Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed. Proverbs 15:22 ESV
Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety. Proverbs 11:14 ESV
Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2 ESV
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice. Proverbs 12:15 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for always hearing me, and for Your Word that gives instruction and guidance. I thank You as well for providing those who can give us professional help when it is needed. I am thankful for the counsel of friends, and for the blessing of a good, christian counselor. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
While there are a myriad of issues that can benefit from counseling, I can say personally that a counselor is invaluable in helping sort out the mess in your mind, when it comes to adultery. I found it causes anxiety to keep things in, and it released tension to talk things through. I am so thankful for the availability of counseling, and the choices I had open to me.
I lived an entire 47 years before I ever darkened the door of a counseling center. I am fortunate to have not felt it necessary in my past, but when I was faced with infidelity, I needed an outlet for my thoughts and feelings. While I had many friends and family I was able to talk to about my situation, at least to a degree, they were all connected to one side or the other. I loved having a safe person to share my thoughts with who was completely outside of the situation. This person had the necessary training to make sense of the issues I was dealing with, and offer ways to cope in a positive way.
Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Many people feel that they should be able to deal with life's struggles on their own, but many times, we just can't do it well. When we try to handle big things on our own, we often don't heal in a healthy way. Not only did I find a listening ear in my counselor, I found an invaluable friend. While I went for close to a year by myself, I am thankful to have sessions now with both of us present. A counselor is so helpful in opening up our eyes and hearts to the needs and feelings of our spouse.
You may have grown up hearing that counseling is a waste of time, or that you can fix any problem on your own. I want to encourage you to remove any old thought patterns you may have heard against it, and look into a good christian counselor. Once you go and connect with one, you will soon see the rewards for having someone professional and safe, giving guidance and encouragement.
Having a christian counselor that supports the truths found in scripture is important. Not only did I find one of that fit that description, but I also received wonderful advice and help from others. None will be able to shed as much light as someone that has walked the journey of infidelity. And of course I had my Heavenly Father, always with me, and listening to my thoughts and my heart. Speak to Him- share your feelings, and know that He is completely invested in you. When we open our hearts to those willing to help, we will be on the road to healing, much faster!
Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed. Proverbs 15:22 ESV
Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety. Proverbs 11:14 ESV
Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2 ESV
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice. Proverbs 12:15 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, I thank You for always hearing me, and for Your Word that gives instruction and guidance. I thank You as well for providing those who can give us professional help when it is needed. I am thankful for the counsel of friends, and for the blessing of a good, christian counselor. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Saturday, February 2, 2019
Counting my Blessings
When life borders on the miserable side, it's helpful to back up, and make a mental note of what I am grateful for. As a human, I tend to dwell on the negative issues I am facing, and fail to appreciate the positives. As Christians, we are encouraged to embrace our trials, recognizing their ability to draw us closer to Christ, but my flesh often gets in the way.
My brain was saturated with my situation, and what the outcome would be. I worried about my husband, I struggled with insecurities, I feared the future, I wondered about finances, I felt for my children, and I wished for a different life journey. I felt anger at times, and frustration at other times. I longed for the second coming of Christ in a new way- a way to escape this mess. I cried often, I prayed fervently, I hoped and pleaded. This was my way of life for longer than I wished. Living in this state is not experiencing the joy the Lord offers us- a joy that is not dependent on our circumstances.
If you are walking in the more difficult areas of your life story, join me in looking for the many blessings we have, despite the heartache and pain. I have so many blessings, and I don't want to miss them, even amidst hard times. I don't want to live a life lacking thankfulness for the good things I am given, because I am too focused on the harder things.
When I step back, and look at my whole life picture, the painful parts of my story are much shorter than the joyful moments. Yes, the painful parts will forever change me, and I pray they change me for the better. I know that God will use those experiences to allow me opportunities to reach in and help others, that will walk similar roads. And honestly, that is also a blessing.
We will all feel heartaches and disappointments in life, from time to time. But if we can, in those moments, look to the One Who has blessed us in other areas, we can take a little breath and thank our Heavenly Father for the things we are able to enjoy. It doesn't make the pain go away, and it often doesn't change our circumstances- but it can change our perspective! I want a perspective that focuses on the good things He has given me, and the promises He has made. I can remind myself of the truth found in Jeremiah 29:11- He has GOOD plans for me!
Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, Psalm 103:2 ESV
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 ESV
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, Ephesians 1:3 ESV
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, when my days are hard and painful, help me to look for the good You have given me. Focusing on the heartache and pain is exhausting and steals my energy and joy. Help me literally count my blessings, and remember to thank You for them. You have been so good to me, and I am thankful. Give me a grateful heart, In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
My brain was saturated with my situation, and what the outcome would be. I worried about my husband, I struggled with insecurities, I feared the future, I wondered about finances, I felt for my children, and I wished for a different life journey. I felt anger at times, and frustration at other times. I longed for the second coming of Christ in a new way- a way to escape this mess. I cried often, I prayed fervently, I hoped and pleaded. This was my way of life for longer than I wished. Living in this state is not experiencing the joy the Lord offers us- a joy that is not dependent on our circumstances.
If you are walking in the more difficult areas of your life story, join me in looking for the many blessings we have, despite the heartache and pain. I have so many blessings, and I don't want to miss them, even amidst hard times. I don't want to live a life lacking thankfulness for the good things I am given, because I am too focused on the harder things.
When I step back, and look at my whole life picture, the painful parts of my story are much shorter than the joyful moments. Yes, the painful parts will forever change me, and I pray they change me for the better. I know that God will use those experiences to allow me opportunities to reach in and help others, that will walk similar roads. And honestly, that is also a blessing.
We will all feel heartaches and disappointments in life, from time to time. But if we can, in those moments, look to the One Who has blessed us in other areas, we can take a little breath and thank our Heavenly Father for the things we are able to enjoy. It doesn't make the pain go away, and it often doesn't change our circumstances- but it can change our perspective! I want a perspective that focuses on the good things He has given me, and the promises He has made. I can remind myself of the truth found in Jeremiah 29:11- He has GOOD plans for me!
Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, Psalm 103:2 ESV
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 ESV
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, Ephesians 1:3 ESV
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, when my days are hard and painful, help me to look for the good You have given me. Focusing on the heartache and pain is exhausting and steals my energy and joy. Help me literally count my blessings, and remember to thank You for them. You have been so good to me, and I am thankful. Give me a grateful heart, In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
Friday, February 1, 2019
This Old Man
This past summer, I was driving home from Home Goods (one of my very favorite places to spend an hour or two), and I ended up crying the whole way home. It was a rainy, dreary day, and my heart was still pretty sore. I didn't cry over a song, I didn't cry because someone said something to me, I cried over an old man.
There is an intersection in a nearby city, with a grocery store. This intersection is pretty busy around lunch time. As I was sitting at a stoplight, I see an old man, umbrella in hand, a bunch of fresh flowers and a grocery bag in the other, making his way across the street. He doesn't look grumpy about the rain, in fact, he has a smile on his face. I watch him cross the intersection and start walking along the side of the road. The next neighborhood is probably a quarter mile up the road, and he starts along his way. The rain didn't hold him back, the distance didn't hold him back, and his age didn't either. Wow! Some sweet old lady is going to witness his love for her shortly. I was happy for that lady, whoever she was.
I wanted that kind of love, too. The kind that doesn't have obstacles in the way. The kind that goes out of its way, to reveal itself in big ways, yes, but also little ways. It's easy to show our love like this when love is new. But when we get used to one another, often we forget to love carelessly- no limits or barriers. Along the way in marriages, we often allow life to create barriers that stand in the way of showing our love- don't! Don't let things take precedence over simple displays of affection. Be that old man, carrying home a bouquet in the rain. Don't let rain hold you back, or anything else. Just show your love faithfully, thoughtfully, and selflessly.
This is how God loves us. Nothing prohibits His love. Our behavior doesn't, and I'm so thankful for that. He doesn't get used to us after a while, and change His mind about us. He consistently, patiently, and faithfully showers His love on us. His is the only perfect love there is, and He perfectly loves me. And I remind myself of this on my drive home, and my tears of sadness, turn to happy tears. Because no matter who else loves me, or fails to love me, He always loves me exactly the same. Thank You, Lord for Your perfect, faithful love!
For God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 ESV
So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 1 John 4:16 ESV
The LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you. Jeremiah 31:3 ESV
Give thanks to the God of heaven, for his steadfast love endures forever. Psalm 136:26 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, people will let us down, and hurt our hearts. We often forget how to love one another the way You have called us to love. Help me, when my heart is hurting, to remember Your perfect love for me. It is never conditional or performance based, and I am so thankful for that. Help me to return Your love, even though my love is imperfect. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
There is an intersection in a nearby city, with a grocery store. This intersection is pretty busy around lunch time. As I was sitting at a stoplight, I see an old man, umbrella in hand, a bunch of fresh flowers and a grocery bag in the other, making his way across the street. He doesn't look grumpy about the rain, in fact, he has a smile on his face. I watch him cross the intersection and start walking along the side of the road. The next neighborhood is probably a quarter mile up the road, and he starts along his way. The rain didn't hold him back, the distance didn't hold him back, and his age didn't either. Wow! Some sweet old lady is going to witness his love for her shortly. I was happy for that lady, whoever she was.
I wanted that kind of love, too. The kind that doesn't have obstacles in the way. The kind that goes out of its way, to reveal itself in big ways, yes, but also little ways. It's easy to show our love like this when love is new. But when we get used to one another, often we forget to love carelessly- no limits or barriers. Along the way in marriages, we often allow life to create barriers that stand in the way of showing our love- don't! Don't let things take precedence over simple displays of affection. Be that old man, carrying home a bouquet in the rain. Don't let rain hold you back, or anything else. Just show your love faithfully, thoughtfully, and selflessly.
This is how God loves us. Nothing prohibits His love. Our behavior doesn't, and I'm so thankful for that. He doesn't get used to us after a while, and change His mind about us. He consistently, patiently, and faithfully showers His love on us. His is the only perfect love there is, and He perfectly loves me. And I remind myself of this on my drive home, and my tears of sadness, turn to happy tears. Because no matter who else loves me, or fails to love me, He always loves me exactly the same. Thank You, Lord for Your perfect, faithful love!
For God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 ESV
So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 1 John 4:16 ESV
The LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you. Jeremiah 31:3 ESV
Give thanks to the God of heaven, for his steadfast love endures forever. Psalm 136:26 ESV
Dear Heavenly Father, people will let us down, and hurt our hearts. We often forget how to love one another the way You have called us to love. Help me, when my heart is hurting, to remember Your perfect love for me. It is never conditional or performance based, and I am so thankful for that. Help me to return Your love, even though my love is imperfect. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!
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